(Reasons We're Probably Not) Dating Or In A Relationship Thread NSFW • Page 5

Well enough that I'm seeing her again tonight!

 

Favorite (successful or not) Tinder opener?

 

I've had an erection for over four hours. Take me to the hospital?

 

"I thought I was using tinder, but clearly this is your profile for ModelsOnly .com" is pretty successful.

Or "can I ask you a question?" [they oblige] "I'm learning about important dates in history. Would you like to be one?"

 

Did she ever leave?

 

My friend once used: "Can I be your hedgehog?".

Bizarrely, it actually started a conversation, because the girl didn't know what a hedgehog was.

 

I did the whole tinder thing and went on a couple dates but it wasn't really my thing. I met my current girlfriend through a mutual friend at the time. We went on our first date and she hasn't left my apartment since and it's been over a year.

 

Does that mean you're still on your first date?

 

That's all code for he's keeping her hostage

 

I got free Gaslight Anthem tickets through tinder once. That was pretty cool; she was really nice.

Met my girlfriend through OKC and couldn't be happier.

 

On my first tinder date with my now GF I showed up about an hour early and placed pieces of a handmade "treasure" map around the downtown area we were at. Each piece led to the next and contained a clue for where to find the next. Started at a record store w/ clue hidden on a paramore album , then to the library etc and eventually led a spot with "buried treasure" with some candy and a voucher for "free booze with me" redeemable at any time. Then we did the normal coffee and chat thing. That voucher gave her an excuse to hit me up for the 2nd date though and we've been together since. After we got through the awkward dating phase, she said she wasn't going to go out with me again but the scavenger hunt is what got me to date 2. If you think they're worth it then put in the effort and you'll be gravy!

 

I cringe every time I get the "Have you ever had an Australian kiss before? It's like a normal kiss but down under." from Australian dudes.

I typically trying to beat them to the punch and write some bullshit line about the spiders being huge.

 

I wonder what my odds are of being involved in some sort of open relationship with Enrique Iglesias. I think I'm going to put my efforts there for now. Hope Anna Kournikova is cool with it.

 

Started texting that girl from tinder and she said to send a photo with a fork on my head (funny way of making sure I'm real probably) so I told her it's gonna cost a photo of her with a shoe on her head, which is actually some dumb old meme from forever ago. Suffice it to say the results were priceless. Fun way of breaking the ice.

 

Two days

 

You can do anything you set your mind to! I'm patiently waiting for the day Annie Clark picks me up and say she wants me to be in her life each and every day.

So, yeah, I've got that going for me, haha

 

starting to sound like andy milonakis

 

My partner's mother yelled at me this morning. She gave me a ride to work and proceeded to lecture me about adulthood. I don't think I'm going to have anything to do with her from this point forward.

 

Had you spent the whole journey kicking the back of seat and yelling "Are we there yet?"?

 

I've been with my boyfriend for 6.5 years and people can't stop asking about when we are getting married. people need to pump the breaks! for reals.

 

I always seem to attract the real weirdos on tinder-

 

Rawr, found out she has a boyfriend, haha. I'm so confused.

 

I think popular culture has given me unrealistic expectations of relationships. Seems that it should be some epic love story with all these Taylor Swift-esque lyric feelings and it never is for me. Like when I hear love songs I wonder if people actually feel that way or if I'm weird and unfeeling because I just don't feel that way towards people. I rarely get crushes and I'm very emotionally closed off so I just can't imagine feeling so head over heels and vulnerable for another person. Even before I turned jaded from past relationships I just never had that feeling and it makes me think I'm missing out. I think I'm a robot.

 

Hey, even a robot can be programmed to love.

But I feel ya. I don't really think it's a problem for someone to have different passions than others. I find I relate much more to the introspective, difficult love songs of Descendents, Frank Turner, etc. than to the head-over-heels, everything-is-great songs that pop up on the radio from time to time.

 

I don't think I relate to many love songs, if any at all. Like I enjoy them a lot and appreciate the poetry, honesty, imagery, or idea of the feelings I guess, but I don't necessarily relate to any of them. But I listen to them and I'm like DANG do humans really feel this way about other humans??