Food • Page 924

Damn, it's been a month since @Justice Beaver helped make this thread great again. Sad!

 

idk if i've ever had a shake from DQ, I either go for a Mr. Freeze, Blizzard, or a Dilly Bar.

 

I don't go to DQ, there are way more Sonics around

 

I got one a few days ago and it was SO GOOD

 

Dilly Bars are amazing. But DQ black & white milkshakes are probably my favorite fast food ice cream based treat.

 

Dilly bars sounds so inappropriate

 

chocolate and vanilla mixed?

 

Vanilla ice cream + chocolate syrup!

 

nice

 

I always go for a mint chocolate chip, or peanut butter banana, or strawberry pineapple, or something when getting a shake

 

I can't recommend this recipe enough:

Kale Turkey Pasta Bake - iFOODreal

 

Ground turkey is so underrated. That looks delicious.

 

So I know this is like a year late or whatever but I’ve been fidgeting around trying to write this forever. Then I had a bunch of stupid life stuff interfere and haven’t been able to hang out in like a month which is the worst and I missed you all unbearably. I figured if I was gonna pop back in I’d rather it be with a bang.


Etymology: What the fuck is a chalupa? Like Wikipedia would have me believe that Taco Bell, the bastion of Mexican cuisine, is lying to us about what exactly a chalupa is. Some deviant dedicated an entire paragraph to the chalupa Wikipedia page about how Taco Bell’s chalupa “doesnot resemble or taste much like its Mexican inspiration.” I call bullshit. Next you’ll tell me the Double XXL Crunchwrap Supreme isn’t “authentic” or “real food.” Anyway, my real issue here is that in no fucking way is this thing “naked.” First off, the thing is fucking fried. So like, if I said I’m eating a “naked chicken breast” you would assume, and rightfully so, that it wasn’t fucking breaded. “Naked Chicken Chalupa” conjures a lot of images and none of them are correct.


Appearance: It’s a fucking taco made out of fried chicken.


Smell: Surprisingly pleasant. There are few things like the shame scent of Taco Bell. That stuff just hovers. If you’ve eaten Taco Bell in the last month your car still smells like it, your house still smells like. In the words of Darryl Philbin, “taco air is heavy, it settles at the lowest point.” The Naked Chicken Chalupa did not smell of shame. It mostly smelled like chicken which, you know, having their “meat” smell like the actual meat is probably a first for Taco Bell.


Taste: Oh god I hate myself. Let me preface by saying that I thought this thing was gonna be way fucking worse. Like I assumed that there would be taco “meat” inside the chicken. As I’m writing this I’m actually starting to become cognizant of how fucking absurd this thing is. Like with no taco “meat” on the inside this thing is not a taco, we’ve already established that it’s not a chalupa. Holy shit. This thing is just a bunless chicken sandwich folded in half. I honestly think I respect how stupid that is. Also, it was delicious. How miserable is that? Like the chicken wasn’t dry, the weird sauce they put in it worked really well. I was sad when it was gone. Now, normally I’m sad after I’ve eaten Taco Bell but it’s sad in like a regretful sort of way. A look at my life, look at my choices kinda way. Instead I was sad because I only got one thinking it would be disappointing at best. That probably says a lot more about my life and my choices.


Intangibles: I haven’t been round in a forever because of things but I ate this with the express purpose of forcing myself to write this review and get back into the swing of the thread and I’m glad I did.


Score:

 

What a comeback

 

Obligatory:

 

Brilliant review. Are the NYT or WSJ hiring a new food columnist? If not, they should be!

 

Well-Done Steak Without Shame

Nevermind, WSJ just lost all food credibility by running that bullshit.

 

lul. They couldn't handle my caliber of writing.

 

sonic shakes are the bomb

 

Anybody tried Sonic's Slush shake?

 

Reese's extreme blizzard gets an 8/10. angrycandy approved

 

Why not a 10/10?

 

bc that would be perfection, no? this is good but it ain't perfect

 

@Ken, how do you feel about this: Dry Age Steak At Home - Dry Aging Beef - Charcuterie & Salumi Kits

 

Damn it Chase. Milkshakes are so delicious and good and you managed to rattle off the three most unappealing sounding flavours. Admittedly, I would probably be into peanut butter banana, but strawberry pineapple?? What is it, a juice box?