(Reasons We're Probably Not) Dating Or In A Relationship Thread NSFW • Page 347

That's fair. I think Fourier is used for quantum pretty often for wave-particle shit. Put a pin in that though. I'm trying to blend in!!

 

I had the best date tonight. Connected on Tinder over the weekend and met up tonight for drinks which ended up being fun and conversation was natural and not super forced.

Then on the way out we saw someone spray painted "Fuck Feminism" on a business across the street, so we walked to the hardware store, bought spray paint and fixed it to say "Fuck yeah! Feminism!"

All in all, great night

 

Yeah, not a fan either. I have a bubble and I would like that preserved.

 

hell yea

 

Most people wouldn't think it, but I could be super affectionate with the PDA. But I dunno why someone would want to do that with someone who is obviously not into it.

 

Solution:

 

They lost me at "Kissenger".

 

Yeah, I'm the same way. My girlfriend isn't an overtly PDA person, but she's brought up she wished I did it a little more -- holding hands, arm around her and whatnot -- but it's just not me at all.

 

This has been a point of contention in past relationships for me. Having been on both sides I'm not sure it's the "public" part that's the operative term, but rather the "affection". People just express and receive affection in such nuanced ways that are very difficult to communicate informatively or descriptively a la "actions speak louder than words". I want and need to receive affection this way, but it's hard for me to communicate it. They want and need to receive affection in this way, but it's hard for them to communicate it. That is to say if the affection that fulfilled my needs was present I can't say that the domain, public or private, would be a necessary factor. I think the majority of the remainder in my case can be attributed to jealousy or other insecurities...and I don't think that's inherently negative either. Having those character traits challenged is healthy. Those challenges just tend to be often accompanied by conversations with higher frequencies of irrationality, or high-emotion/low-inhibition tendency. Interpersonal communication is truly one of the most nuanced concepts we deal with. Relationships that do not meet expectation are a certainty. I think the grasp we have on mitigating the psychological and emotional effects of perceived failure is pretty amazing, all things considered.

 

Tomorrow morning I'm moving halfway across the country with the love of my life

 

Between the holidays, a recent move back home for my girl, my girls falling out with her best friend, and me getting sick alone time with my girl been hard. Luckily its not straining too much... few days ago we had a battle but it was over other things. I feel bad tbh but I'm so sick that my arms and legs feel like they weigh a ton. I'm so exhausted, and she was trying to get me going earlier tonight and I was just like blah.... let me get my legs back at least cus rn even walking makes my knees wanna check me on some "Mfer we feel like this cus you're sick af and need rest, don't make us collapse on you" shit lol.
This cold cannot go away fast enough.

 

Yeah, it's been something difficult for me to wrestle with, because we perceive, give and need affection in completely opposite ways. She's enjoys giving compliments and holding hands and stuff -- and it's not just an in-public sort of thing -- and I'm just not that way. It's something I think I've worked on. I say I love you more and I'm more expressive, verbally, in my feelings for her. It comes up in the very rare occasion we have a fight or one of those discussions where you take stock of the relationship and I know that I could do more. It's a fine line for me, because I have to fight back the feeling of being "forced" to do things that I'm not accustomed to doing. In the grand scheme of things, I should be more affectionate, because it's what she needs and I should be doing more to acquiesce to my partner's needs. On the other hand, where does it stop being something that I'm doing to accommodate her and helping our relationship and it starts being me changing who I am?

Then I realize that's a ridiculous notion and that I need to do better at it. And not just for the sake of being more affectionate, but it has helped/will help me be more expressive about the things I want -- not just from her but in all areas of my life; like at work, with friends, etc -- and that's a positive.

But, as someone who deflects every compliment they get and, thus, doesn't put stock in giving/receiving compliments, it's hard as fuck to just flip the switch to being that way.

 

Just like the Rams :')

Kidding I'm so happy for you and hope you enjoy it there even though I know you will

 

out of town guy keeps sending me songs that are "us" and just leave me obsessing over dissecting the lyrics and trying to gauge how I feel about it/how I should take it.

 

This seems like an abusive tactic that is intended to produce just such a result. In other words, distance produces an uncertainty in terms of one's capabilities in controlling things, so one attempts to exert control in another way.

 

One year with my boyfriend today ❤️

 

Can't keep a convo going with anyone. sucks mang.

 

Tell him to stop?

 

you're probably not wrong. this makes a lot of sense.

I mean I don't know why I would. We are still talking and stuff. I just can't help but completely over-analyze "what does it meaaaan"

 

When someone is like "this song is so me and how I feel" and the lyrics are really sketch and make u think less of them as a person it's so awk.

Like Lips of an Angel was my mom's and mister's(?? Is there a male form of mistress?) song on a mix he made her and that's when I knew they were both assholes lol.

 

Right!!!
also lol ew at lips of an angel. of course you judged them lol

 

Well I guess if it's not really bothering you, then don't

 

I broke up with my ex like 5 years ago and sometimes I still realize some ridic manipulative thing he did that I never realized at the time was manipulative. Yesterday I randomly remembered something and was like wow he was being sus af and I knew it at the time, but I guess I never made the connection just how gaslighty and manipulative it was until now. I feel like if I had any talent I could make the most depressing breakup songs cause I got loads of material lol. Move over, Kelly Clarkson!!

 

I said to my girl "this song is me and you" and it was a Soviet Union military song