General Forum Chat Thread (I) [ARCHIVED] • Page 531

First up, I don't agree with Anna's tweet due to the personal nature that it took. I wish, for the love of everything, that instead of subtweets or things blowing up other places people could talk to each other. I feel like so many things could be resolved with people sitting down and talking. But, I think that bridge is burned, and it doesn't look like that's going to be happening, it makes me sad but I understand it completely. So here's my thoughts:

I am upset that something that happened off this website, on Twitter, is enough to make people not want to be on this website or not support it. That hurts me, deeply and personally. I'm sad about it. I'm sad to be losing three people here on this website that I like talking to and greatly respect. But I understand it. So I will definitely abide by your wishes. I refunded Phaynes, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯, and Sopho's supporter memberships - and I will gladly deactivate these accounts for you guys at the end of the day as well (wanted to give you time to respond to me here, or PM, if you wanted first) because you don't feel safe and don't feel welcome and that's not right and I totally understand that feeling and I definitely don't want to force you to stay or anything like that. I respect your decision to not post on these forums.

Anna is a moderator of two specific threads (Women, LGTBQI+) in the politics forum. AFAIK she hasn't even posted anywhere else on the site yet. AFAIK she hasn't said anything like what was said on Twitter on these forums. She asked to moderate those threads while the site was getting up and running. But, I absolutely understand people feeling like because that was said on Twitter they do not want to participate in these forums. I understand that and respect it. I reached out to Anna to talk to her, but I am pretty sure she is working and I haven't heard back quite yet. I'll make further decisions after speaking with her.

This hurts because I was reading news and posting about All Time Low and preparing for a day of bug fixes and all of a sudden people seem upset with me over something I didn't even say and are cursing at people in threads and everything got extremely hostile really fast. But, I understand why and my hurt isn't what's important here. People were hurt. I just would like to also say that I feel like there are now more people being hurt and I would like to stop that if we can.

To the three of you that I've seen post so far that this personally hurt, I would like to offer my personal apology: I am sorry. I feel like I let you guys down. I wish you all the best and know that my door is always open if any of you need to talk about anything at all.

 

This all really sucks, and it seems like certain people are more worried about venting their precious feelings than being an adult and being supportive of someone who clearly needs it

 

I appreciate you taking the time to say this. Anna is still actively talking about this issue, within a few minutes ago, on Twitter. I think an apology of some sort, at the very least for tone/wording, isn't too much to ask from her but I don't see that happening. I hate to be a pain, and I can understand her not wanting to go somewhere that she thinks she will be met with aggression, but if she has time to continue to dig that hole on twitter, she kinda has time to address these issues she's been tagged/called out on here, no? I don't want my account deactivated because I don't believe these discussions should be erased. I just can't see myself positively interacting within the community going forward. While the events that took place might have directly related to Jake, I have dealt with addiction in the past (as I said this weekend), and what she said was deeply offensive to me and it hurt a lot. She isn't just speaking on Jake's interactions (and stuff that seems pretty misconstrued from what actually happened) - she's making broad statements on addicts and addiction as a whole and I cannot associate with that.

 

Sometimes I don't get notifications for this so I think the thread is dead and then I check it and suddenly I'm 6 pages behind.

 

You'll have to speak with her about that. What she does is out of my hands completely. My understanding is that there is a conflict between some people and I can't force anyone to do anything - I can talk to both parties and offer advice and suggestions - and at this point my suggestion to everyone is to use the mute and block button on Twitter as much as I do. But that's just me. I'm sorry you were triggered. I'm sorry you were hurt. My apology obviously is not the one you seek, but it's what I have and I'm giving it to you unconditionally and full-hearted.

 

If you haven't visited a thread in a while it doesn't fire off notifications (because it would be crazy amounts for like a thread like this), so it will wait until you visit it again.

 

Then don't? Why does supporting someone's feelings mean suppressing some else's? If you don't feel you can positively interact with the community then that is 100% within your control and no one else's.

We have all dealt with stuff, I imagine Anna has. Why are we robbing her of her feelings in order to protect someone else's?

 

@Jason Tate Want to make it very clear I'm not blaming you for any of this and I appreciate you taking the time to address it. I look forward to the outcome of your conversation with Anna and am hopeful that it will lead to a resolution that will make myself and others more comfortable.

 

No one is robbing her of her feelings. People are upset because she said something extremely hurtful, personal, and triggering towards another person who is going through something extremely serious.

 

whatever happens i hope we dont lose sight of the real crime in all this

namely @scott surette leaving his baby in a snowstorm to go bro it up with his buds on south beach for a second year running

 

That makes sense. I was pondering about that for a while. I was afraid my browser was bugging out or something. Thank you!

 

She expressed herself on her personal twitter account and used no names. Again, Anna has feelings too.

 

Literally no one is robbing her of that. She is continuing to talk about it and no one is able to make her stop. Why are you being so obtuse?

 

I'll go back to exactly what I said before. On her personal Twitter account, she said some very hurtful, personal, and triggering directly towards an individual (don't say she didn't use names because we all know who she was sub tweeting).

 

I guess I don't understand why she should stop. She is expressing her viewpoint on her personal twitter. You are free to agree with it or not, look at it or not. I just don't see why she needs to be "stopped".

 

No one said she should be stopped? I didn't say she should be. I said she isn't having anything taken away from her. Which is what you said.

This can't be real.

 

Anna and Kayla and anyone else have a right to say that Jake or myself or anyone else are acting like assholes or whatever. What they do not have a right to do is to tie that to broad-stroke statements about addiction, as a means of belittling someone in large part because they suffer from a disease. How long would a poster last on this site if they started lobbing thinly veiled attacks at and attempting to silence someone who had cancer, while also making broad negative statements about cancer patients? Addiction is a disease, and not recognizing that and it's full implications means that you're stuck in the era of fucking Leave It to Beaver or something. Sure the way addiction's symptoms manifest themselves are often uncomfortable and painful to others, but no one is saying that the disease is a get-out-of-jail free card. We're just saying a little compassion might not be out of line.

I'm done for now. Gotta go to work.

 

Because it's incredibly hurtful and offensive to a number of people in here who have expressed how uncomfortable and offended they are. She can avoid using direct names all she wants. It does not absolve her of the consequences her words have and how much they have hurt and alienated others in this thread.

 

Did I misunderstand this?

You know what I can't believe is real, a group of adults getting this upset over a series of tweets. They're fucking tweets guys, it's fine, don't look at them.

If you want to leave, leave. Anything that upsets you on this site from this point forward is entirely your responsibility. What communities you choose to participate in is entirely within your control.

 

HATE HATE HATE subtweeting, my goodness. Seriously. Ah.

 

I don't know you personally so idk your personal relationship to addiction/addicts; however, there are multiple people on this site who feel uncomfortable with the way that the situation is being handled. Rather than a conversation (public or private) happening between two groups, it happened, completely one sided, on a public platform. It's not for you to understand because it's not your fight.

 

Man.
I don't have any words.

 

I understand this. What I don't understand is why you don't just stop looking at her twitter feed?

 

Nah, b, we don't need to have a conversation about the weight of words online. Don't diminish the power of online interactions.

 

Unbelievable point of view.