Tiny Things That Annoy You • Page 303

He knows how to survive in the wilderness better than you and i

 

I throw it on my engine and do a lap around the neighbor.

 

Worked on my childhood cat She was just trying to stay warm

 

My old roommate used to do this so I ended up buying them a toaster.

 

Apologies for the graphic memory. She survived, my dad drove to the store and back and then she fell out of the car when he got home. Burnt her belly pretty bad but lived more than a decade after that.

As a good roommate would

 

I’m annoyed that I prepared too much sloppy joe filling on Monday and as a consequence have been eating joes every night since

 

I work at home doing a phone job which sucks because I never know if someone is going to call me last minute and keep me past my shift.

I used to think I was being smart by starting to cook my dinner before I got off so it'd be ready by the time my shift ended, then one time I had pizza in the oven and someone called me and kept me a half hour after my shift ended and my pizza was literally a burnt black to a crisp. I was so fucking upset.

 

This isn't true, garlic toast is served with Italian all the time, also you microwaved your fucking cat????

 

Toasted garlic bread is not toast bro. And no I didn’t microwave it, my dad accidentally scorched her after she crawled into his truck’s engine compartment when it was warming up. I watched gremlins, I don’t put animals in appliances

 

When you fully stop your car so someone can cross the road, and they reach their hand out at you telling you to let them cross. Yeah man I’m fully stopped, I’m not just going to let go of the brake while you walk lol

 

I do that but it's usually a gesture of me saying thanks to the driver lol

 

A line for the bathroom

 

Watching the “new” married at first sight season that’s on Netflix and that 38 yr old guy annoys me. He is so shallow. Said he won’t date a girl who is under an “8, among other shallow things. He also looks immature. No wonder why he was single.

 

Sometimes I feel like Alexa is giving me sass and has a disappointed tone in her voice when I say no to something stupid she tells me about. Usually after she asks a question and I say no she’ll just say “ok” and that’s that but sometimes there is no response and sometimes I swear she says, “hmm” and it freaks me out lol

 

People be farting at this wonder years concert

 

those truck engine compartments are so accessible to small animals i would be paranoid af about killing something if i owned one. once drove a company truck over 100 miles when it started smoking really bad. opened the hood to find dozens of chestnuts some squirrels had stashed in there what kills me is how well organized they were.

 

The punishment for going to a Wonder Years concert

I kid

 

Aaron I swear to god

 

I'm a little stinker, don't mind me

 

The seeds that don’t pop in a bag of popcorn

 

The prices at the laundromat went up again.

 

I hate going to the laundromat on sundays. There’s this couple that likes to take the entire row of top dryers instead of like a section of top/bottom then they get in my way when I’m trying to load. Like ok?

edit: that lady that’s part of the couple literally just reached over me to the top dryer while I was unloading the lower without saying excuse me. This is why I made that statement about a section of dryers so no one is reaching around anyone else

 

When places don't have somewhere to sit and eat and drink so you have to walk around while eating like a little gremlin