Saves The Day Band • Page 67

@Vase Full Of Rocks Just co-signing everything here and in this in particular. Obviously, ardent abuse apologists are some of the worst our scene has to offer, but the absolutists can be tiring too. The music meant something significant to you at one point and there's always going to a sliver of it there, even if it's tainted. You shouldn't let a stranger on the Internet make you feel bad about doing what you need to do to work your way through the situation—especially if those actions aren't implicit financial support.

 

I heard a podcast with Pete Parada where he said that he was ready to give up on being in bands after his toxic experience with Saves The Day, but he said something like he still knew it was a good idea to try out for Offpsring when the opportunity was available.

 

It’s pretty discouraging to be portrayed as an abuse apologist, I could not be further from that. Every single comment here is valid and welcome, the overarching issue is how does this behavior stop here? We all have to stop putting people on some pedestal and stop worshipping people who will inevitably fail us. I’m understanding and sympathetic to any situation, my heart is crushed by all those that have experienced wildly abusive relationships. I’m optimistic that if you can separate yourself from the blind anger and see that the issue is not solved by writing any one person or band off. This is one, of I’m sure, many more to come

 

Hmm, to piggy back off of this I remember listening to a lengthy interview with Chris Conley, he mentioned the fallout with Eben and around the time before in Reverie and STA there was a low point and the band had group therapy.

 

With Eben I conject it was likely an ego clash and difference in creative direction. Though after Eben really only had a quick run playing backing guitar with a solo NYC solo artist named Lissie Trullie and then went full time into production.

That dude is one of my bass heroes and I wish his groovin melodic bass runs had a second life but alas they didn't.

When I listened to 9 I wondered who the "elegant bird on the red carpet" is and who he left 19 messages to as referenced in the song 29. Was it his ex wife, Dave, or someone else? The leaving 19 messages part sure didn't age well and definitely wasn't a metaphor.

 

Right!? The whole sending (I assume his ex wife) messages thing always did make me think it was an overstepping of boundaries. i really liked the song because of its authentic emotion .. but definitely made the assumption of dealing with struggles within the bounds of healthy outlets. Sadly, as fans of anyone making music its probably common to expel toxic tendencies and polish them as just dealing with heartbreak.

 

It's going to be crazy to think of all these songs and lyrics with this new context. It makes 90% of them seem so troubling.

 

Gotta change my avatar for the first time since I joined AP.net.

 

Similar to Jesse, a lot of those lyrics seem like it was revealing it the whole time. Troubling for sure.

I still can’t wrap my head around the timers. Fucking disgusting, creepy, manipulative. Whatever you want to call it, so gross

 

rodrigo tweeted that hes going to comment later, arun disabled his twitter. Safe assumption they are both outty.

This has been my favorite band for quite some time, and im not sure what my relationship w their music will be going forward. I do honestly hope that chris shuts it down and closes the book on the band: they were already fading from relevance, and were one of the less popular legacy acts in the scene, comparatively, on top of all this coming out.

It's such an awful and disappointing situation, and I don't really have much else to offer than I feel terrible for the victim and hope they can heal, and also as someone who is clearly both suffering and hurting people, that chris can back out of his public platform and heal too.

 

I was driving to the dump today and I haven't edited my playlists yet so a bunch of Saves stuff came on and it was just so strange even hearing the instruments knowing what we know now. Him saying something like "Where are you?" or "Bye Bye Babydoll" just made me uncomfortable.

 

I think Arun just changed his username on Twitter , and they haven’t updated it on the Saves profile. But no statement there either.

https://twitter.com/arunbali_?s=21

 

I haven’t listened to saves in a little while, but my roommate had a mix playing earlier and driving in the dark came on and I started crying.

Fuck, man....

 

I'm so sorry you're going through this, but I can assure you.. as a massive fan of another band with a lead singer accused of horrendous actions, you'll be ok.

Your relationship with the artist changes, but the music and the memories associated with it are still what they mean to you.

 

I've only liked/really listened to Sound The Alarm when that came out, and it's been years since I listened to it until recently where I've played that album quite a bit up to almost the day this broke... no chance I'm listening to this or Two Tongues ever again.

 

thanks, I appreciate the support.

I’ll be fine, most definitely. I’m sorry you went through it. It’s a terrible feeling knowing there’s people that are hurt out there by people you’ve admired n loved for years.

 

So did I read the your band sucks instagram correctly in that a full article with additional details will be released next month?

 

Yeah I believe there’s an actual piece coming out.
If the victim feels comfortable sharing their experience and will be a step forward into their healing process I’m 100% in support. Especially if there’s still the nerve to continue on as an active project

 

RT.

 

I’ve had an In Reverie tattoo for over a decade. That album means the world to me.

.....Fuck.

 

Have a problematic band tattoo as well. The album can still mean that to you. It meant all of that to you in those moments entirely independent of this information. 99.99999% of the people you encounter aren’t clued into this and don’t care. It can suck when you really think about it, but just try to remember that you got it for a good reason in the first place.

 

Like Drewski said, the album can still mean a lot to you and the tattoo doesn't have to be a bad thing. But, artists have gotten pretty good at covering unwanted tattoos, so you have options. None of this is our fault, so we shouldn't be making ourselves feel guilty over things like this. Just makes the pain worse.

 

Whoa, did not know that. That’s cool.

 

actually you know i may be confused about that, because i remember the liner notes of the CD said he did some of the artwork for the album but google is saying it was a Brazilian artist named Stephan Doitschinoff so idk anymore

 

I have an 808s and Heartbreak tattoo that is just the heart/gloves artwork and I certainly feel like it has meaning aside from its connection to KW