(Reasons We're Probably Not) Dating Or In A Relationship Thread NSFW • Page 88

im not actually telling them we're having sex



although if they ask where she's gonna sleep that might be awkward

 

And you have proof you did it once, I found the weirdest way to describe a child

 

"On this dick, mom and dad"

 

Tell them you gave her the bed and are sleeping on the floor. I'm sure they're not that stupid but it's worth a shot.

 

My dad and me talk about sex in like a making filthy jokes way. The best is when he tells my step sisters "No we cant come to dinner tonight because i'm going to be smashing ur mum"

To my mom and step dad I take the same joke approach but being uptight Mormons my mom pretends to be outraged even though she laughs at most everything I say but always adds "why do you always have to take it too far?"

 

This is the perfect answer.

 

I found it to be way easier to make sex jokes since I've had a kid. I mean clearly we did it.

 

I got a very awkward lecture about sex before marriage when that happened. For all they know I haven't done it since

And well I may as well not have

 

How the fuck did I miss all the fun conversation yesterday?! You people are awesome.

 

my pediatrician told me about sex when i was like, 8

 

NOPE

 

Ask pencil-butt, things aren't supposed to go in there.

 

Id prefer we all just didn't have them tbh

 

Before I went to college my mom gave me a talk about how I should go on bc because sometimes people get swept up in the "throes of passion" and I died. Also she had 3 unplanned kids so I felt like I should've been lecturing her instead imo!

 

I wonder how much I'd have to pay Jason to change @ChaseTx username to Pencil-butt

 

I just wanted to share a funny story that happened to me by accident

 

Well you ruined pencils for me for life

 

Stop pencil shaming chase

 

Yeah, I switched to pens yesterday.

 

I'm holding a baby for godsake

 

i love it when my wife wears knee high or thigh high socks while we have sex.

 

^RT

Not YOUR wife, you know what I mean.

 

i love it too.

 

I never got a sex talk from my parents.