Mental Health Thread • Page 238

It's been over a week since we split up and I've had my son almost every single day and night. Which I think was my biggest worry. Afraid that she'd take him away from me and I'm seeing now that I'm going to eventually be okay.

 

This sounds a lot like me currently. If I’m honest, I’m really happy at work when I’m around people (which seems weird) but as soon as I’m home and I don’t have to put up a “front”, I’m just lazy and exhausted as shit. But i don’t even know if it’s being exhausted?

I’ll let all my dishes pile up to the point I’m debating what to eat based on what utensils I have left, which usually results in me going out to eat, spending money uselessly and eating shitty.

It’s weird because once I finally do wash the dishes and laundry I feel great and I like having a clean house, but it seems like while I know how much I like having a clean house and know how much satisfaction I get from doing chores I just don’t have the... ambition...? To get it done. It’s been bugging me a lot why this is happening (going on... 5 weeks or so now)

 

dude never responded so I ended up having to send a 4th email asking if he'd put me down for may 6. and he was real pissed off saying how "first off" he'd done me a favor with the letters thing, and yes may 6 is the best date I'm going to get and basically i should be happy otherwise it's fall 2019 instead. So, cool, i get to stay poor on purpose for an extra 5 months. But i have a phallo date! So why do i feel awful inside?

 

I'm sharing a positive update, I had a few « interviews » (can't think of a more fitting term in english) with employment agencies thanks to a careers fair, and there's a chance I might work starting from next week.

I'm looking for ways to temporarily live somewhere else to protect myself from my parents, which is scary but it is necessary and urgent at this point.

I'm driving again thanks to a friend, and I hope to get my license as soon as possible.

I'm close to becoming an actually independent adult in my mind, it's tough but I'm getting there. I have no idea how long it will take to overcome all of this trauma but I'm on the right path.

Seriously, anyone that reads this, self care is the most important thing. Don't let anyone take control of your life, and be on the lookout for potential red flags once you meet someone. I hope it can help someone, even if I'm not doing much.

 

This makes me so happy!

 

I almost went full blown catatonic when the hurricane hit us lol I never want to go through that again.

 

I managed to walk from the edge and I’m doing better, shit was scary tho. I legit had all these thoughts about wanting to die, no one liked me anymore, I wasn’t good enough, etc. I felt so trapped and alone in my thoughts. I’ve managed to get my substance abuse under control for a minute, that’s helped too. I was drinking close to a twelve pack a night, it was getting so bad. I’m trying now to find focus, I hope I can persevere through this.

 

This really makes me happy to hear, ami, keep going and don’t stop.

 

Does anyone else’s mental health cause physical health symptoms? My migraines cause me to not leave the house or even move. I can’t even sleep cause lying down doesn’t help, so I rock back and forth on my couch, which oddly helps. I feel like killing myself to stop it. It’s the anxiety and it’s been proven.

 

Yeah I get migraines too which I never used to get. My doctor thinks they're stress/anxiety related and she's had to prescribe me meds for them because over the counter wasn't cutting it anymore. I also think my stress and anxiety is completely screwing up my back and shoulders. I'm so tense all the time and like when I went to a pumpkin patch recently I had to stop and sit for a while because my back was so tense and hurting. Def impacts my sleep too which domino effects everything else in my day

 

I get headaches once in a while but nothing like this. Have you seen a doctor for it?

 

my dad was telling me yesterday that I shouldn't completely write off going back to school in the future
I tried explaining that school has become a trigger for me and that I've based my selfworth on academic performance for a long ass time so all the failing made me suicidal
not sure he got it

 

Yes. It’s purely psychological and emotional shit, so there’s nothing they can do for it. Just behavioral therapy

 

have you tried CBD?

 

I'm having so much anxiety about basic tasks like sending e-mails and I feel like such a failure of an adult. I know a lot of adults get anxious about e-mails but I become completely avoidant until the last minute and I don't know if there are going to be negative consequences as a result. I really don't like myself right now and I don't feel capable of doing anything.

 

i am oh so close to breaking i can feel it

 

No. What is it?

 

What is Cannabidiol? | Project CBD

 

Ah, cool. I’d have to look into it and attempt to get a doctor for the card or something. Thanks.

 

I'm getting my card in January when I can afford it (birthday gift to myself). Weed is a wonderful thing.

 

CBD contains no thc, it’s legal in all states you don’t need a card!

 

Then how do you get it?

 

starting zoloft today

 

I've been wondering about this - the only reason I don't have a card is that marijuana isn't allowed on campus. But if my school doesn't specifically mention CBD oil not being allowed, it should be fine right? Since it's not marijuana and has no THC?