(Reasons We're Probably Not) Dating Or In A Relationship Thread NSFW • Page 25

My rural town has cheap rent comparatively to other cities so I feel like I can never move cause it's just so outrageous to me lol. Like my parents rent a house big enough for the 5 of them for the same price I can get a teeny studio in the city.

 

I live in a 2 bedroom house and my bills come out to $1500 at the most. I can't even fathom paying more than that.

 

I'm too scared to and I realize it's silly but everything makes me insecure, part of it is also I don't want someone meeting my parents unless we're like engaged because I'm superstitious

 

oh man. mine is a "one" bedroom, maybe around 600 sqft. luckily i don't drive anymore so i don't have to pay a bunch in gas and insurance. Every now and then it crosses my mind to just move to florida and buy a big dang house and live like a king for what I'm paying now...Maybe in a few years I'll retire

 

I live like 3 blocks from the hospital so I walk if the weather permits. I'm actually looking at jobs in Panama City Beach bc a girl I went to school with is a nurse and says they can't keep people employed in the lab. As long as you don't live on the actual beach it's not too expensive. So I'm all for moving to Florida haha

 

In my situation it helps that it's just been Mom and me since 2002 (divorce). So we've built a whole life on caring for the house/each other/etc. I pay for certain bills, her for more currently (once I get a salaried position, we're re-visiting the financial split). It just doesn't make sense for either of us to live on our own financially, and the job market in Knoxville is repulsive. I feel like everyone in our generation is way more aware and understanding, too.

 

Isn't it something like 70% of college grads move back in with their parents because the job market is shit?

 

Something like that. And something like 25-30% aren't moving out until their early 30s now.

I've kinda mentally set a goal for myself to move out by 28 (Dec. 2017, so call it early 2018). But if I'm also here saving money until I get married (far down the road, obviously, as I'm very single), that may be a smarter decision, too.

Another opinion of mine is that if they have a problem with me living at home, they could potentially have a problem with my Mom and watch what you say about my mama.

 

I wish I could do this. I don't ever wanna introduce any guy to my fam but they are sooo nosy and my town is so small no way I could get away with it

 

I fell in love with a girl when I was in high school. Since then, I've had no interest in dating anyone else for some reason -_-

I don't like her now as I haven't seen her since 2010 and last talked to her in 2012, but that's a-ok with me.

 

I might've messed up. I happened to see my wife's phone, and she was nowhere around. She always takes it with her. It's never out of her sight. Just out of curiosity, I opened it up and looked for a couple seconds. She walked in. "Are you looking through my phone!?". And then I started to lie badly and then just whatever. She walked away mad. Now she won't talk to me.
Did I fuck up? Or is she overreacting? Would an innocent person be that upset?

 

You're her husband? I'd assume if she has nothing to hide she wouldn't give a damn if you picked up her phone. I know the only time I care if someone picks up my phone is if I have inappropriate pictures in my gallery. Other than that, I don't care if people read whatever is there because I don't have anything to hide... You should talk to her.

 

You fucked up. You have to respect your partner, and have no right rifling through her phone. It sounds like you have deeper problems with your relationship though if you're suspecting her of something. No matter what the state of the relationship though, you have to respect your partner, and try to keep your jealousy under control.

 

I don't agree with that. If you trusted her completely you wouldn't have anything to fear. The question is what the heck is she doing to make you not trust her? Again, you should talk it out. Personally I wouldn't marry someone that I didn't trust 110%

 

Uh yeah it's always a bad decision to go through someone else's things unless you have cause to be suspicious

 

Even if you're suspicious, talk it through with them. It's not healthy or fair to go around snooping on your partner.

 

Yeah, whoa Internet, don't go making this guy believe his wife has something to hide, Jesus. Just talk to her, you two are married, haha

 

Ya being upset for thinking someone was snooping through your stuff doesn't automatically mean they're hiding something. Some people just value their privacy. Personally, I wouldn't care if a SO was looking through my phone as long as it wasn't my texts. Were you looking at her texts?

 

Talk to her. Making assumptions is stupid. I would assume being married means you share everything and maybe she's pissed bc you invaded what little privacy she has? I'm not one to give advice but I don't want people going through my phone even if I were married/in a relationship regardless of whether I had something to hide or not.

 

Trust and faith are integral parts of being in a relationship. Regardless of whatever they may or may not be doing, if you don't feel like you can trust your SO then your relationship needs some kind of reexamination.

 

why cant a SO look through your text? Call me old school, but my SO could look at whatever she wanted. There's no "mine" everything would be ours. Emails, facebook, doesn't matter...Unless I was flirting with other people then I'd say "f that, I need privacy"

 

Because the only reason someone would be going through my texts is if they didn't trust me about something. Plus, those are private conversations. Part of not wanting people going through my texts is out of respect to whom I was texting -- they are texting with the understanding that the conversation is between me and them and not someone else. Whether or not you're cool with sharing everything with a SO, I don't think it's cool to allow private conversations to be shared with someone else without the consent of the person you were conversing with.

 

It's not a right though. It sounds like you're super open, but that's your choice to make, not someone else's. Understanding boundaries is always important. It sounds like this guy knew he shouldn't have been going through her phone, so I think that says it all.

I get where you're coming from, and it probably is a bit more old school. Some old couples have joint Facebook pages and joint everything, but the idea of that for some couples would make them want to die haha. Some people just like their own spac, privacy, and identity.

 

The biggest roadblock to successful relationships is the idea that you collapse into one another, erase all boundaries, and become one. In response to the actual situation, Old Fuck, what you did was disrespectful and she has a right to be upset. If any trust was broken, it was on your end.

 

I don't know what being in a relation ship is like but I wouldn't be comfortable with a SO going through my messages of any kind. Maybe a friend confided in me about something that's kept between us or maybe I opened up to a friend about something I don't want my SO to know. If I wanted to tell them something I would and I would do it when I'm ready