The Eternal Cringe Thread • Page 15

I'm 31 and just barely have my shit together. Also my birthday(ugh) is the day before @ComedownMachine's

 

Will I ever have my shit together or will I die first? Stay tuned

 

I'll probably die first.

 

I'll definitely die first

 

Then there's no hope for me rip friends

 

I'm 30. It's already halfway over for me.

 

Happy birthday

 

I'm 28 and I have my shit together like the lime guy in that lime carrying meme

Like I think I've got most of it and then I'm like "oh shit!!!!!!!!!!!!"

 

The lime carrying meme? wat

 

oh damn it lol

 

I am v mature so it's understandable!

 

And I’m...not. So, I get it

 

I mean I set a pretty high bar don't be too down on urself!!

 

RT

 

I posted in the gen thread yesterday how I tripped over my space heater and it fell so loudly the landlord called to ask if I was okay so there is that

Today I had to mail back the clothes i didn't want for stitch fix and I was supposed to send it back by today and it's all late at night and I should've done it earlier but I didn't have time and I'll have even less time tomorrow so I went to the blue mailboxes and tried to stuff it in a zillion times but it wouldn't fit and I'm freaking cause I don't wanna be charged anything for it being late. A car pulls up and I'm mortified because I hate when ppl watch me struggle. The person from the car at the mailboxes behind me shouts that there's a door in the back for larger things so I'm already embarrassed and I go to the back and since I'm so anxious I panic and don't see the handle and it's dark and I can't open the back and she has to shout to help me with that too. Like why. Why can't I do anything in a normal and dignified manner

 

Last night I ran into a childhood friend. She's married and pregnant and we've grown apart. Anyway, I ran into her at the store and I failed so hard at pretending to be a functioning human being. I could not relate to her life at all and didn't know what to say but felt the need to make conversation and it was torturous. I think it was made more cringey because I kept being like "SO MARRIED WITH KIDS LIFE" and she doesn't seem to enjoy it a ton and I didn't know how to respond. It was like I was an alien being who had never communicated with other humans and have not yet adapted to this world.

 

I can get by in small talk but I am by no means gifted at it. it just heightens my anxiety and makes me worry about how everything I say is coming off to the other person. most of the time I'm just praying for it to be over. but when I do get into those situations I just try to imitate all the fake people I know and that has served me well. it's seriously the worst tho

 

like half the people that work in my office also work in the indie movie theatre across the street so i am constantly doing the awkward wave and "heyyyy" thing trying to act like a human being who isn't totally spooked by seeing casual acquaintances in the wild.

 

It ended up being fine after I explained myself, but this gal last week said I was her best first kiss ever and I said "Are you serious" instead of just saying "Mine too"

 

If I'm somewhere like work or another public place and I accidentally make a sound that resembles a fart (like with my shoe or chair or something), I immediately try to make the sound again to sorta "prove" that I didn't actually just fart. Does anyone else do this? It just happened to me and I realized it's sorta cringey

 

I do it every time.

 

100% lol

 

So I grew up with a big family and had like 8 cousins all within 5 years +\- of my age. Every year I would come up with these ridiculous play ideas and convince all my cousins to play role and preform in front of all of our parents. One Thanksgiving when I was like 7 I convinced all my cousins to do the story of pilgrims and Indians having the first thanksgiving dinner as taught in elementary school. Two of my cousins who were siblings were the romantic interests and for some reason I had them kiss, just a quick peck on the lips.

I didn’t know any better back then... man was that an awkward dinner.