Pinegrove - Skylight (September 28, 2018) Album • Page 18

Also let's not overlook those Petal tweets which are heartbreaking

 

Do we know they are actually about him?

 

the relationship the singer of a band has to a fan, is vastly different to the relationship someone has at a bar to another random person at a bar. Its goes beyond general sexual attraction, as a lot of the times fans idolize these singers.

 

We don't, they did tour together last year but that doesn't implicate him so much as provides possible context.

However, that doesn't make the tweets any less heartbreaking

 

Not for sure, but I can't imagine the timing is coincidental, considering they run in close circles and she'd presumably realize people are going to jump to this conclusion.

 

how many awkward/less than great looking kids started playing songs to try and gain the attraction of people of the opposite gender in the first place? i never thought about that being an inherently bad thing but I guess I need to think about it

 

Im barely even surprised at this point, and have no interest in his apology. I read it, but it doesn’t change anything. Still entirely his narrative. We don’t know anything about the allegations.

 

Seems to be an honest confession and apology, and glad he's trying to get help, but obviously there seems to be more going on that we don't know yet.

 

So groupies are illegal now?

 

Friends from NJ are saying they’re not that surprised, that they’ve heard stuff like this about Evan for a while. Never anything too serious, but that he’s made weird comments along these lines around them or their friends.

Sucks for everyone involved, especially any victim(s) in this situation, but I’m glad Evan seems to have realized this is not ok behavior and is getting help.

 

Thanks for reading the thread before posting garbage

 

I'm like...beyond confused.

 

I've read it

 

yeah even if there's consent involved, and the person is like 28 years old, you probably shouldn't sleep with someone who idolizes you. It's likely going to get ugly because by default you are way more important to them than they are to you. The minute that becomes clear, they are going to feel used and realize the artist was just pretending to feel the same connection, in order to coerce a sexual response from them.

It's complicated. Sex might seem like an awesome idea to a fan in the moment, but then later they realize they just felt pressured to leave an impression on the artist -- which highlights the ugly reality that the artist only gave them the time of day under the premise of expected sex, and they wouldn't have left the same "impression" otherwise.

EDIT: is it possible to find fans of an artist that don't idolize that artist, and have a self-respecting, realistic view of the artist's humanity? Yes. But as quickly as some musicians seem to try to find someone to take back to their tour van... I don't think any of them are really taking the time to figure out if the dynamic between themselves and that fan is healthy.

 

Whole thing is a bummer. Regardless of where we draw our own lines/our confusion with the boundaries of fan/artist interaction, a line was crossed in order for this situation to come to light in the first place. Calling people "groupies" or questioning the events that transpired are moot, at this point. Could be a misunderstanding coupled with a skewed power dynamic, could be something much more harmful.

 

The rest of us must've missed the part where any legal action was mentioned at all.

 

There's definitely more to the situation + his own actions regarding pursuing fans in general than Evan is leading on, he deserves no praise

 

i gotta be honest that statement is extremely confusing in a bad way

 

Same

 

How do you know there's definitely more? How does someone actually trying to get help deserve no praise?

 

Then I should remind you that this conversation is murky and we're all trying to navigate the intricacies of power dynamics and stripping women of their ability to consent by telling them that they're always in a power imbalance


But then again you're using disgusting, sexist language so maybe I'm wasting my time with someone who doesn't actually want to have this conversation.

 

So is there just no way at all for anyone accused of any amount of wrongdoing to get better?

 

just seems like we're bordering on scary territory of telling women who they can fuck and how they should feel about it, try and be mindful to not reinforce the very power imbalance we're discussing

I'm out

 

Excellently put. I was having a conversation with my girlfriend regarding this, and she was saying she doesn't understand why it isn't equally the fans fault. I will actually use this as an explanation.

 

Seems that way now a days