(Reasons We're Probably Not) Dating Or In A Relationship Thread NSFW • Page 447

I've been lurking this thread for the longest time and I still have no idea what half this thread is talking about.

The other half is pretty cool though.

Hope stuff improves for you. Don't want to barge in to anyone's personal life, but talking about it some more might help.

 

I'm sorry you're going through this. I hope you're doing okay

I always feel the same lol. I'm such an uptight hermit that I feel like an ideal partner would help bring me out of that a bit. I think if I dated someone too similar to me I'd never leave the house or talk to another human again lol. I'm very attracted to personality too. The other day someone was saying that the first thing everyone notices about others is if they're attractive or ugly. But I don't really think that way? I see most people as kind of a default neutral. Even if I do find them attractive I just think "oh, they're cute" and shrug it off until I see their personality more and I guess that's where actual attraction comes in, which is rare for me.

It sounds corny but I've noticed with flirting that the way they make eye contact is always the tell.

 

My girl and I have gone through so much and there's still some uncertainty in regards to things but we're working through them and I'm set to FINALLY move down for good hopefully within the next week. So stressful last month esp, almost cost us our relationship (on both hands, both at separate times and together) but seems finally like maybe... JUST MAYBE... life will let us breathe finally.

 

[Serious]Redditors who are now married because you didn't know how to break up with your SO, how is that going for you? • r/AskReddit

 

I feel so gross & unlovable.

 

I feel the same way :(

 

I don't know how people differentiate so I refrain from saying things to people haha.

 

I just want a girl who will solve all my problems with no problems of her own and also no goals or motivation or agency of her own!

She should have no other purpose for existing other than my well being!

 

She should also have great hair wether a cute pageboy cut or long with bangs and have a cute quirky fashion sense.

 

Dude you can't just generalize, ya know? Some girls will like that you're skinny, some won't. That's life.

 

she has to be Zooey Deschanel exactly as Zooey is presented

 

coming from a super skinny guy lots of girls like skinny guys. met a lot of girls who aren't into the whole being ripped thing. that being said I could gain weight so easily but my diet is atrocious. I should weigh 140 just by eating enough but i'm like 120ish.

 

i actually have friends who hate dating super skinny guys because when they lay on them they lay directly on bone / ribs and it's not comfortable. i was like, "whoa, i never even thought of that" but it makes sense.

13 seconds is when it gets good:

there's also a scene where Erin says hugging Gabe is like hugging a skeleton because he's so skinny

 

start doing sit ups or something like that. the belly is the hardest part for most to keep in check / get rid of. it's not necessarily a weight issue / eating too much. it's just where the majority of our food goes (captain obvious here) and then sticks around. jumping jacks, sit ups... try things like that?

 

Don't worry about "what women want". Women aren't a general entity.

 

I'm becoming pretty good friends with a few of my coworkers and I think I'm developing feelings for a couple but. It's like a crush situation more than anything and I think it'd be a bad idea if anything came of it because I really like being friends and this is all a nice feeling either way lol

 

Oh man the body image stuff, having similar issues because summer time always does that to me

 

Honestly dude, just eat healthy and hit the gym. Last year I cut out sugar and most empty carbs from my diet and started going to the gym 4 or 5 days a week and not only did I start getting cut but I felt amazing and was incredibly confident. Unfortunately, once school started I sort of lost all motivation and I've gained all my weight back and I feel like a piece of shit but now that school is over it's time to get back to it. It takes a lot of self discipline but it's totally worth it.

More importantly, you should talk to a doctor or a therapist.

 

As someone who is extremely overweight and my current beau is literally 105 lbs (and 6 foot so...yeah. very skinny.)
size don't mean a thing
play on playas.

 

I feel that way about guys too honestly. Less so now, but it used to be really bad. Watching all those american pie-esque teen movies where women are talked about so grossly and judgmentally by guys made me think that guys like over-scrutinize everything about us and then joke about it with their friends or something. Which I feel like isn't totally irrational cause I've seen plenty do it.

But you'll never be happy if u make decisions based off what you think others want, or being a version of yourself you think they want. Of course it's easier said than done to overcome something like that, but there are plenty who can see the beauty you possess. I feel like everyone is insecure about their looks in some way, and deep down we're all just too hard on ourselves and trying to figure out how to be happy. That's how I try to view others who intimidate me or who I subconsciously put "above" me anyway. So it's either true or total projection lmao

 

I have those kind of fears as well. Things I think too hard on but in the grand scheme of things I know won't really matter.

The Front Bottoms has a song that sums it up pretty well: "I keep thinking about the wrong things, and then the wrong things become everything."

But if it bothers you I think that might be the motivation you need. Like even though most girls don't really care about it, you should still do something, both to feel good about yourself and that you're making an effort to be a positive influence to other people. It might feel like a little thing but I think people you meet would really appreciate the fact that you're putting an effort to make yourself better, regardless if you need it or not.

 

It's big talk I know but I struggle with that as well. Most days I don't even want to stare at a mirror, but I guess trying and failing is a start at least.

 

I figure nobody is as hard on me as I am. I think the flaws I perceive are so exaggerated in my mind that it's all I see in the mirror, but nobody else does. I def remember having an ex who said "your body is so perfect. Except..." which was upsetting but idk, now a days it's like... the issues I have with myself can't be changed and being so miserable over something that's 100% out my control is exhausting.

I'd like to think that for the most part if someone is with you/approaches you it's because they want to and are interested. Maybe im naive but I like to believe that most people don't wanna waste their time like that

 

I had a great date and things seem promising

 

Good day with my lady, last few weeks been super stressful and stretched us so thin it almost broke.... good to see we gained back our perspective of that it's us together against the hurdles not putting em up against one another.