The A1chemy Index Vol. 5: Dan should not have the ability to change this thread title • Page 341

That's quite alright that's what i'll be doing most of the time too

 

I had no idea Laura was into me until I asked her out and she agreed to go on a date with me and even then I thought she was pitying me until she grabbed me and made out with me before leaving my car

 

Yeah I'm awful at figuring that out. It's happened a couple of times and my friend is like "why didn't you ask for her number or something, she was flirting with you" and I'm like uhhh what?

 

We get you’re handsome please for the last remaining shred of self esteem I’m clinging onto just stop

 

Me same.

 

No

 

this is the greatest thing i've ever heard you say.

 

oh. well buy one.

 

It's one of the only good things my mom did while an alcoholic

 

One time I was in college. Poor little 16 year old me who skipped a grade in college with 18-19 year olds.

The worst part was I actually did have the courage to flirt with her. I worked the dorm front desk and when she first checked in, I asked if she, needed help with her mailbox (obviously she didn’t lmao but we both knew that). Then she actually came down later that day and asked what I was doing that night

We watch a movie and a half cuddling and my dumb naive ass asked her if she wanted to go out on a date that weekend, like this wasn’t clearly her hinting at a hookup. At which point she laughed, got “tired” and didn’t invite me to her room again lmao.

But she was nice and not awkward when we had business classes together a couple years later, so maybe it wasn’t a bad thing that I wasn’t super sex minded, when UMD was very much a gross college campus when it comes to dating.

But I feel you @Fucking Dustin and @CarpetElf I am OBLIVIOUS

 

I think the weirdest part of my dating history is that I dated the same 3 girls in 2013 as I did in 2014

 

TIL the 'fucking' in your username is a verb

 

everyone here has a crush on me.

 

My bf took me to a bar to meet his friends and I still didn't realize he was into me until that moment.

I thought boys and girls could just be friends but apparently not, what a scam

 

We all know you're working that slim thicc bod

 

HEYOOOOOO

 

we're just friends unless there's something you're not telling me

 

I don’t know relationships

 

i look like a grocery bag filled with (vegan) mayonnaise don't try and (vegan) butter me up, max

 

I've never been confused whether someone was hitting on/flirting with me since it's never happened haha.

 

I have never flirted in my life I don't know how

 

im ugly but im funny. i know my strengths

 

why is the butter vegan but not the mayo

 

ive hit on you literally every single day for the past 5 months except for the last week while i was banned