Accountability in Music • Page 898

I was raised in a strict Mormon family and deconstructing was a very painful and frustrating process for me. Good luck on your faith journey!

 

Justin Insane

 

Having gone through exactly this myself, I care as well and my heart goes out to you. It can be a pretty gut wrenching experience and I hope you’ve got a good support system. Take care of yourself.

 

as others have echoed, much love to you during this time. from experience, it can feel really scary and isolating to have things slip out from underneath you when you begin to question your upbringing, but you're absolutely not alone. there are many of us who have felt that pain and confusion, but ended up on the other side healthier and stronger, aided by others who have felt the same. we're here for you.

 

welcome back! This is a little beside the point, but I always enjoyed your posts- probably in part because you were very active the band threads I frequented. I hope you stick around!

 

Pleased to see you here again and also my heart goes out to you as your navigate the faith/life questions you are processing. I know the conversations with church leaders you described well - hope you have people supporting you where you can be yourself and be real about what you’re going through as it can get lonely sometimes. Hopefully we’ll continue to see you around here.

 

previously mormon club here too!

 

I had some other account at some point but oh well I guess I had two and this one is the one that's getting resurrected. I had thoughts.

I'm a long-time lurker here, and have mostly lurked here and also absolutepunk, for years upon years. I have a strange relationship with this place because I'm quite familiar with some of the trends here, some of the posters/ex-posters, etc. I almost resurrected my account at some point for specifically a situation in this thread earlier on in 2024, but decided it was not worth getting into - when I say I have "negative opinions" of this site, most of that refers to that situation and I guess some political opinions I've seen prevalent/small things. There are definitely things worth criticizing about the community here, but absolutely nothing out of the ordinary in my opinion.

What's out of the ordinary is the god damn abomination that that Brand New subreddit has become/perhaps has always been, and what a lot of """""""cancel culture"""""" related things have become. With the shift towards fascism in the culture throughout the world, it has been frustrating to see a lot of Gen Z and younger become attached to bands that absolutely do not deserve to be remembered or worshipped, and it's even more frustrating/disgusting to me to watch some Millenials fall into the Baby Brain Never Grow up nostalgia trap, especially in the context of Brand New.

I get it - Brand New was one of my favorite bands, for years and years and years (and I certainly connected with them on a level that feels foreign compared to the way these skin-deep cancel-culture tourists retroactively coming in after the fact). For a long time, it felt like a personal betrayal to me when I found out about Jesse Lacey's actions. I couldn't stomach listening to Brand New, at all. This changed a couple of years ago in 2022, when I decided to myself that there was a detachment I was willing to employ to enjoy the music of certain abusive artists again, but never support them - which I feel is a healthy way to go about art.

However, the pendulum has swung so far in the conservative direction, where people outright defend and deny Jesse Lacey's horrible actions. I have no idea what the dude actually feels (mostly influenced by the absent, horrible way the band dealt with the allegations, which I believe have fanned and stoked the flames of all this), but at this point this situation is so embarrassing. It is so embarrassing to watch people still worship at the feet of a band that, while certainly having brilliant moments of music at some point in life, also exists in a world where there's so many artists trying their best NOW, who are accountable, who ARE changing with the times, and aren't defended to nearly a small percentage of the way people bend over backwards for Brand fucking New. I'm over it, man.

I feel that the past decade of media slop has rotted people's fucking brains. I'll have people approaching 30/OVER 30 talking about high school children emo bands being "peak" or "G'OATed". It makes me feel insane because it makes me wish and pine for the seemingly more progressive times of the late 2010's, though I know that that's just feeding into the whole nostalgia cycle itself.

It is intensely frustrating. Look - I'm not looking for Jesse Lacey to be crucified on the fucking cross here, and I don't know what him being held accountable right now would even look like, but personally? Personally, at the very least, I would LOVE IT if we could stop this nonsense, once and for all. These people should be EMBARRASSED with their inability to let go.