Mental Health Thread • Page 349

This is all presuming you're in the US:

If you have insurance there is likely some coverage for mental health services, and if it's through your employer they may also offer an employee assistance program for additional services.

You can also look into local universities who may offer lower cost / sliding scale services with residents and interns. There may be other local social services that provide free or discounted services also.

You can also reach out to the National Alliance on Mental Illness helpline, which offers free assistance and advice 24/7, at 1-800-950-6264. They also provide free guidance on where and how to access resources in your area.

 

I’m genuinely sorry to hear this, that’s a horrible situation in every direction. Hoping the best for you and your family.

 

I went out to the ocean yesterday to hangout with some friends. My gps had no signal/no service on the way back and I had a panic attack. I got lost a few times and I lost it and freaked out. The roads leading up to the area are farm roads for miles. I almost wanted to stop at the fire station and ask for help. It’s a little over a 2 hour drive from where I live. I get so much anxiety driving places I don’t know by myself especially if my gps stops working. There were no signs pointing toward the highway which was worse. Also I can’t see well at night and wanted to make it back to the freeway before it got dark

 

So I ended up in a mental hospital 3 separate times over the past two months, really scary stuff when your brain starts to think you are being tracked at every turn.

Not sure what triggered it between the pandemic and isolation, but I was diagnosed with Schizophrenia after my last stay. Up until now I'd never experienced panic attacks or anything of that sort besides mild depression.

Meds are helping but never thought I'd be in the situation before, I also have a harder time getting myself to care about the video games and movies that used to occupy my free time.

 

George is going to see a therapist next week. Wish him luck!

 

I went from going about my weight loss with a fairly healthy attitude to chaos. Which is what I was worried would happen. Once I started losing weight I began feeling higher pressure to not gain it back. I don't think I'm physically eating in a disordered way, but I am thinking in a disordered way. Like I've spent literal HOURS this morning pro/con listing and justifying/guilting getting mashed potatoes for lunch. I just catch myself obsessing before I eat sometimes. And I'm not even eating super healthy, just staying within a specific caloric range. This morning I went from waking up starving and wanting to eat all the delicious food to stressing over it

 

I'm a month and a half in to re-upping my lease with my roommate who has no idea/no interest in how to clean up after himself and slowly but surely it is looking like I made a huge mistake, to no one's surprise but me. I've tried talking to him about it and he nods his head and says the right things but he doesn't give a shit.

It's actually pretty impressive, if I went about making dinner and went out of my way to be as messy as possible it still wouldn't scratch the surface of how ruinous he leaves the kitchen on a daily basis. Anyways, having to deep clean multiple times a week is actually good, to me. Totally not wreaking havoc on my unchecked depression or anything, haha

 

- Me a few times a year: "do my depression/anxiety meds even do anything? Why do I even take them? I've forgotten to take them for a few days and I don't notice anything and feel fine. I'm not even gonna bother anymore"

- Me after a while with no meds: "oh nooooo they definitely do something. Abort mission."

Do I ever learn? Nope!

 

I hear a lot of people talk about how they are always overthinking the worst possible scenarios in their head just to get themselves all stressed out. Don't get me wrong, I do this too. But I feel like we don't talk enough about the alternative to this which I think is even worse. Which is overthinking the best case scenario and getting all excited about it when in reality you know it will never happen and all you will get is disappointment. Like legit sometimes I will just imagine getting a ton of recognition for something or people throwing me a surprise party or just surprising me with a speech of gratitude basically daydreaming that I am the main character and the world revolves around me, knowing I will get a harsh reality check when none of that happens ever

 

I signed onto an Instagram account I never use except for some dumb filter called "yo pierre u wanna" and saw that my brother followed me on it. Just seeing his name was enough to ruin my day. I've made it abundantly clear to him that I want absolutely nothing to do with him and he just keeps on trying force himself back into my life in whatever way possible. I'm still not over the time I admitted my history of self harm to him and his response was to say I was "turning the conversation into a pity party". I used to try to be the bigger person but at this point I don't fucking care. I legitimately hope he dies.

 

In more recent times I relocated to Denver and have been very much going it alone. I’d had what felt like the best stretch of happiness and balance without depressive episodes until this month.

I found out that my grandfather-in-law has stopped taking his chemo treatment (essentially giving up) and my best friend back home revealed to me that he’s had a shocking reveal over the past year regarding his health. Though he never had a relationship or met him, his biological father’s widow connected with him for the first time ever to reveal that he’d passed along with two other family members within the past 2 years of the same type of cancer (gastric diffuse cancer.) Last summer when he found out, he got tested and came to find out he has the insidious mutative gene in his digestive system already. If it becomes cancerous, there is a 4% survival rate after 5 years. He’s 31. Most don’t make it 5 years. He’s been dealing with this in private for a year. Turns out, knowledge about this type of cancer is still being learned with active case studies and research. He was able to use this time to find others who deal with this and a Facebook group to get in touch with the cancer research institution in Bethesda, MD where he will have a gastrectomy in 2 weeks. That means they are entirely removing his stomach and connecting his esophagus to his intestine. A life altering surgery, but his best shot at life without cancer. It does not come without risk in the procedure itself though and I just booked a flight to go there and be with him for the surgery. Most of my family has either passed or I do not have relationships with anymore. My close friends are what I have left, and I haven’t stopped crying for 3 days.

I know that I’ve misstepped more than once with my words on this site, but despite not always having a healthy experience here it has been more of an important outlet to me than I believe I realized having been a poster since 16. I had stopped posting for some weeks after I caused another user to no longer want to come here. I don’t feel like many care to really interact with me, but for the threads I was active in that small connection has consistently helped me get through days, sometimes years of my life. I really haven’t been having much communication in my personal life and would really love to be able to just talk to people here again because I really feel like I’m spiraling and I don’t want to go back to drinking and drugs to feel better. I don’t even know what anyone could say to make me feel like I don’t live in hell on earth but I just know not being able to interact on this site as of late has been leaving me feeling a void. I truly have been staying quiet and reading much of what posters feel are the right ways of discussing discourse and problems with communication on here, and I want a chance to do better because I really feel like I’m the most alone I’ve ever been.

 

I wish I had someone to talk to but I have no one. People will tell you they’ll listen but then get tired of you and stop. I’m lost what to do. I can’t live life normally anymore

 

I had been seeing a therapist until my job ended last summer and I moved here/no longer have health insurance. It was the best option for me for some time and it helped. If you are able to seek out a professional through your healthcare provider, use that. And if the first professional you see doesn’t click with you, try another. It took me 4 attempts to find someone that felt right. I hope to go back soon enough when things are less hectic and I can afford insurance again.

I don’t know that we’ve ever spoken on here, and I don’t know that I can help with what you’re going through right now, but I see you and I hear you. I understand.

 

This particular situation a therapist can’t help. I can’t really speak of details publicly either.

 

If you need somebody to listen, and if it helps with me being a complete stranger, I’m here. Message me if you feel comfortable with doing so.

 

how did it go?

 

I had a frustrating day at work and no one to talk to about it. This is why I hate being single

 

I feel like I’m falling apart.

 

Hi. I'm Julie and I'm finally ready to admit I am falling the fuck apart.

ugh.

 

My grandfather got moved to hospice today and I'm feeling sad.

 

just got out of rehab again the other day...5th time since december plus a psych ward stay and an emergency room visit in that period too....im doing alright all things considered but i cannot stop fucking up and relapsing and i dont know why...my mental health seems to be alright when im sober but i can't shake that compulsion to use when it comes back up...i havent been able to go a week without using unless ive been institutionalized at any point in the past year. and ive been on and off and in and out so much that i dont even get the flooding of emotions coming back when i detox....there's just this flat numbness i feel, i guess its just anhedonia but i dont experience many highs or lows in my mood at all and it gets frustrating and i end up using just to feel something, even though after the initial rush using just numbs me up more. ive also had several overdose scares and have been narcanned a couple times now and it just doesnt phase me...not that im trying to kill myself consciously more like i dont really give a shit if it does happen especially when im in active addiction. im just in a really weird spot right now and while i know it will fade eventually my confidence is shot. im three weeks clean today but that means very little to me, i just need to stick it out and try and reach that 60 day mark, which i havent gotten since i had a year clean and relapsed last june. since then the longest ive been able to rack up was 36 days and 29 of them were in rehab...

 

I don’t know where to start. I’m overwhelmed and stressed from work because of the shit I have to deal with currently. I wish I had a companion to talk to but I don’t. I want to try dating again but it’s not safe for me. I don’t know when it will be safe. Doesn’t help that my choices have never been good where I live. Being lonely sucks. My cat keeps me company but I want human company. I’m just not the type of girl guys want. My last relationship left me so traumatized. I have trauma from growing up and idk if I’ll ever find someone that I can open up to about it. Idk if I’ll ever find someone that will understand. I feel like I’m being punished. It doesn’t seem right for me to have been born into the shit show that I was. It doesn’t seem real. It’s like a nightmare that I can never wake up from

 

I feel ya on the dating thing. Joined a couple dating sites and am getting no interest from women on there. This has caused me to do some deep self reflection and it’s been painful. Half of me wants to fix those flaws and the other half just wants to come to terms with the fact that some people just never find anyone.

 

I strongly feel like I’m one of those people that will never find anyone. I’ve never had much luck in the dating world. Just end up getting used and lied to, or the guy ends up being a dud. Because of it I took many breaks from dating to focus on other things (which never went over well due to my crippling depression). Now I’m in my 30s wondering what could have been if I found a decent man.
I thought my ex may have been a possibility. He was everything I wanted but didn’t think I’d find. He ended up being cold hearted and truly an awful person, something I never thought I’d say about him, but it’s the truth. It took me a while to come to terms and realize that. It just makes me more terrified to date. The last date I went on was a year ago but he ended up not being interested after meeting me. It really messes with your self esteem especially when it’s already low. Every other guy I’ve chatted with on dating apps ended up ghosting me. Even ones that say that hate that people ghost. Like what?

it’s lonely not having a “plus one” when everyone else does. It hurts to see people having fun with their SO and you’re sitting at home all alone.

 

Went to visit my grandfather in hospice today and he passed away 30 minutes before I got there. Ugh. Was hard to see him, but was glad to be with family. My poor grandmother is going through issues with her memory while this is all going on and it really makes things hard. Halfway through being there she forgot who I was .