Accountability in Music • Page 558

Yes agreed,

I meant more the discussion dissecting these apologies is focusing too much on the wrong part imo

 

Sports press conferences when an athlete or coach does something deserving an explanation or apologies for example, are broken down and speculated upon at nauseam by media & fans because like you said he had to say something, so it is inherently disingenuous, everyone knows it so reading between the lines is encouraged, which I'm not a fan of tbh

 

A lot of Hospital Bracelet's "brand" seemed to be cruelty under the guise of social justice/bullying people for being less "woke" than them and it always really rubbed me the wrong way

To be entirely honest I see a lot of that type of behavior celebrated in this thread and I hope it opens a few more eyes now

 

By bringing up his sobriety issues and depression in the post he has automatically and subtly gained compassion from the reader. Which amplifies the idea that he is a manipulative abuser.

 

The timer thing reminds me so much of the NXIVM / DOS / keith Raneri cult behavior. So gross.

 

This is not me trying to start shit. I’m genuinely trying to understand what “accountability” looks like / should include / being held to. What it seems in this thread is basically if they don't say anything, they're scum for not taking accountability of their actions. If they make a post to take full accountability of their actions, they are manipulative scum that are just trying to get compassion? If Chris left out his alcoholism, would it make for a better statement? What’s the line between “apologizing for getting caught” and “a wake up call”?

Again - not trying to instigate anything. Please help me understand!

 

I think it’s detracting from the actions to bring up alcoholism or depression/mental health reasonings, because it’s not a justification and a lot of times it’s presented as one in these apologies. To me, if an artist is taking accountability and apologizing they shouldn’t also be making excuses and or justifications for what they did.

 

Yeah, people can be alcoholic or depressed/otherwise mentally ill and not do disgusting things like Chris Conley did and it cheapens the discourse around the support of addiction and mental health when it's suggested that these things are mitigating factors. They just fucking aren't.

 

When they get exposed, they always think we want a big heaping of word salad. Add in a more direct apology, specifically toward the abused individual(s), and then it is closer to all that needs to be said.

 

Apologize to those you’ve hurt and mean it, make a donation to a charity that supports survivors of whatever type of heinous acts you’ve committed, don’t make any excuses for your actions or insinuate everything may not be as its been presented, and step down from your platform. It really isn’t that complicated.

 

This is what it should look like:

Also, try to find out if there's anything specifically the survivor wants done in terms of accountability, knowing that they are not obligated to engage with you in any way. And then you fuck off from public life forever.

 

If you have to make a second apology because your first was rushed/not good enough that’s...bad.

 

this is a 19 year old kid whose band blew up and was unprofessional with finances / didn’t properly communicate to their former bandmates that they weren’t in the band anymore. the reaction in the replies is a bit much.

 

A 19 year old isn’t a kid. No, it’s not “a bit much”.

 

I mean, I think the way they treated Manae and Arya was pretty shitty. Definitely sounds like band problems that needed to be called out. I don’t think age is an excuse when they are considered an adult.

 

Also I don’t think saying the reaction to a POC in rock/emo/indie rock music calling out a shitty band member with legitimate issues is “a bit much” when POCs are already the minority in those genres and constantly face shit like this and way worse all the time.

 

show me an alcoholic or addict with a squeaky clean step four and I’ll give you a million bucks. ive yet to meet a single person in the late stages of their disease that hasn’t done extremely fucked up shit due to their disease. but when it comes to addiction “discourse” (terrible word when talking about a literal disease) nobody seems to want to discuss how it literally drives people to do horrible shit, they’d rather just put it all on the person, which is why I carry around untold amounts of guilt and shame that leads to regular suicidal ideation. but what do I know. not to say you can put it all on the disease either but it’s such a gray area that people without experience shouldn’t speculate what is or isn’t the disease when assessing someone’s actions

not saying Chris is all good and everything he did is cool but the way this topic is discussed by people really ignores the nature of the condition and what it actually does to people. it literally makes you lose all humanity and exist on an animalistic level, but if you do horrible things in that condition the disease wasn’t a factor? I don’t buy it because I’ve fucking lived it. I know I’m not who I was or what I did during my active addiction. If that’s who I am I may as well just end it all now. I don’t really know what Chris did or how severe his condition is I just don’t think you can write off his alcoholism as a factor outright. yeah it’s possible he’s just using it as a shield from criticism and if he really wants to do right he should just shut the fuck up and work the steps in quiet

 

According to a follow up post on the account that broke this news, the current members were seemingly not aware.

 

Phoebe was right

 

He did marry his friend’s wife so that was probably a gigantic red flag to being an asshole

 

not to mention the racism in the 70s

 

And the racism a couple years back

 

Clapton sucking ass for fifth straight decade

 

It blows my mind that someone would do that interview and just completely lie about symptoms like that.

edit: hasn’t this dude openly stated he has neuropathy issues in the past?