Mental Health Thread • Page 94

Yep I feel like this every now and again so I completely relate. I miss being with someone, so being lonely sucks.

 

This theory holds! I watched an episode with my sister and she was like oh it's over all ready? That was only 20 minutes

And I was like NOPE it was 40 minutes. You've just been Novela time warped!

 

Also this is kinda weird to put in a mental health thread but also kinda not?? idk. I feel like I've been buying so many things online lately and I can't stop. I'm usually very sensible with money and I think that I still am more than lots of ppl, but I just get the biggest thrill when I track a package and know it'll be there when I get home from work and I love the feeling of opening it and taking everything out. But then it fades fast. I think I just like having something to look forward to. Like works sucks. Home sucks. So I just order more packages when I should be saving money and now I have all these boxes to recycle and the mail person prob judges me.

 

Honestly I get that.

 

Finished my tests and exams, got an entire 19 pages long dignostic from the Autism Center near my town. It feels so good to finally have the answers I had been searching for in my entire 21 years old life. I'm not autistic like I and lots of people thought. What defines me more is the Generalized Anxiety Disorder, which is the cause of basically all my emotional and relational issues over the years. Now that I'm done with that, I'm ready to move on with my life. The therapists and orthophonists, and social workers I saw there were so kind and warm. They gave me lots of advices, like seeking an orthophonist that can help me work on my voice, its tone, so I might sing one day. I'll do some theater and dancing afterwards, the latter of which I always wanted to do, especially thanks to the Y2K era and the Kpop phenomenon lol.

 

It's complicated, I don't know how I get through that feeling. It's frustrating when someone seems so needy and flirty one day, then cold and distant the next. I hate that lol.

 

I think I would do okay with a flat out rejection. The technical uncertainty combined with the inability to resolve it and obtain closure drives me to a really bad state bc I constantly find myself slipping back into a state of denial re reciprocation and then slapping myself out of it, over & over & over

(till it's the next day)

 

i know my feelings are unrequited and i cry about it often. i just haven't talked to or known someone like this before in my life, especially after such a horrible relationship. so i just want to give up and not like or be with someone again, even though i feel super lonely. it's just a mix of annoying feelings.

 

I feel you. I haven't even attempted to try and meet anyone since I got out of my bad relationship. But you're great don't forget that!!! And don't give up!!

 

I feel both of you. I'm in a point where I don't know what to do, how to act around people, and I am thinking if there's something wrong with me. Maybe people find me charming at first, but fear that my anxiety issues are too much to handle for them ? It creates a lot of self loathing, so sometimes I also cry about those relationship problems. I don't get it. Is it that hard to have empathy and to help someone get through his or her issues while wanting a relationship with him or her ? Mental disorders are everywhere, get over it, and be a good person, friend, lover, idk. Sorry for the mini rant, I'm speaking generally lol. I just want to make someone happy, and that said person makes me happy as well.

 

I don't even remember what it's like to have romantic feelings towards someone else, maybe a small crush here and there. But, fuck, show me the smallest bit of attention and kindness and I'm putty in your hands. Fun times.

 

Don't feel ridiculous or horrible. Get it out. Ugly cry, whatever lol It's better than not dealing with it, you know? I hate when people aren't straight forward it makes everything 100x's more upsetting.

 

I feel this very hard

 

Anyone else put off sleep because that means you have to go through another day? But also want sleep because that means you don't have to be awake? Fuuck.

I need a break from work. I know 40 hours a week isn't even that much, tons of people work two jobs and way more hours but I feel so burned out. And I just spent the last 30 days just training. None of my normal work. And I can't ever go home because I never have more than one day off in a row.

I like my boss a lot, she's done so much for me and is the reason I got promoted. Theres a reason I've stayed with the company for 2 1/2 years, and moved cities to continue to work for her. But she is so tough to work for sometimes...especially now that I'm salaried. I dread coming into work a lot of the time. The expectations are so high. The day she asked me if I was interested in promotion was the day I was going to tell her I wanted to transfer back home. But like always I can't even face my problems, and take the easy way out.

Moving to a new city as a social anxiety ridden introvert has been hard, and I've been really really lonely. Especially since now as a manager I'm expected to not hang out with my subordinates, some of whom were the only friends I had here.

 

Day 12. My cravings today are sooooo fucking bad. Keep fantasizing about picking up and using again. Fuck.

 

Nope nope nope nope done with everything. Pretty sure this was how I looked at everyone today

 

I have noticed one of my coworkers has been saying I'm so bipolar, etc a lot and I'm sure it's paranoia but it feels like she's taking digs at me. I really don't like her but I'm always cordial so it pisses me off.

 

Really stretched thin this week. Also just realized as I was typing this I forgot to eat today. Whoops.

Glad tomorrow is friday.

 

Today I was mad so I was gonna emotionally eat junk but it didn't even sound good so I made myself not do it which was hard, and then I got home to make stuff and there were ANTS EVERYWHERE so like all my options were gone and it was so sad. I made a smoothie and had a bagel cause it was the only stuff that survived!

Like a cherry on top an annoying day

 

So many members of my family emotionally drain me. And I can't get away. It's all so exhausting

 

Fuck everything right now. I have no one.

 

You're strong and awesome and you can get through this. If we can do anything, please let us know!

 

On my way to pick up my first prescription of Prozac. I was using Zoloft before, but it didn't seem to work and if it did, i would go from one extreme to the other. What are your thoughts on Prozac? Helpful?

 

Same. Moving and cutting some contact has been fantastic for my mental state. With my sister's drama and my dad doing stuff behind my back, I'm so glad to have some space.

I hope you find some sort of space for yourself soon.

*hug*

 

I'm deleting my account. Bye guys. Take care