Mental Health Thread • Page 87

I get weirded out when ppl comment on my appearance but it's also not a compliment. Like a few weeks ago my grandpa told me I looked like a sailor. What does that even mean???

 

Same while at the same time I'm all wah love me

 

I don't normally get compliments but my fave was when I cut my hair short and my SIL saw me for the first time and told me I looked like Shawn from Boy Meets World. Idk if she meant it as a compliment but I took it as one lol

 

I'm just weird about it. I helped another dept out at work and they're all "yay you're awesome" at a meeting and I really didn't like it. I prefer to exist in the shadows. No attention on me ever. (1-1 attention is cool because I get lonely. just dont put me on the spot)

 

Work is going terrible and it's affecting my outlook, I'm not feeling valued or significant in any way

 

I very rarely get compliments, and when I do I get a little flustered and don't know what to say.

 

Me:

 

I think we had this conversation before on this forum. Very weird deja vu.

I just think you should say thanks. lol

I guess this is one thing I'll never understand haha.

 

Haha yeah, I'll usually say thanks, but it happens so infrequently it catches me off guard. I get flustered easily in almost every situation unfortunately

 

I always take compliments well and just say "thank you" but I think that like subconsciously I try to invalidate the compliment, like I'll tell myself "They just said that because ___________" or "They don't realize that __________" and it's not like I say that out loud but it just kinda happens in my head in some attempt to invalidate the compliment.

 

That's something I need to do better about but I think I'm doing well at it now

 

Ugh I'm so fucking paranoid about everything. I constantly think something is terribly wrong with me, and it's been this way since I was young. I'm on Lexapro and that seems to help a little bit, but I'm thinking of switching to Zoloft which is better for obsessive tendencies I think. I'm just in a really fucking rough spot now, and I don't see any signs of it ending.

 

HUGS FOR JOE 333333

 

My sister does this thing where she will do anything to belittle those closest to her to big up herself from family (siblings to parents) to friends. Me and my brother have watched this for years now and we tire of it (to no surprise) especially considering she's lucky to get 4 hours a work week, yet insisted for awhile on belittling people who were unemployed and/or looking (in my case cus of mental health issues i legitimately suffered from meanwhile she's.... "conveniently" wanted to kill herself and had endless issues everytime she didnt get her way for years)
I don't look to belittle my sister or any family (its just pushed EVERYONE away from her), but since i began working I seen her and my families' focus of "who can we belittle to make ourselves feel better" move to my brother (whom i know would put up with it even less than I) and that concerns me cus hes a lot more callous than I. He's a lot more.... street savy... than I and i don't want him to get in trouble but I can see them pushing him to that from a million miles away and they have no sense of willingness to accept their own wrong/shortcomings (From sister to extended family parents on down the tree) and I'm sitting here knowing my own situation and knowing I'm a lil too.... concerned with future to do anything stupid but knowing my brother does what it takes to survive a bit sick this situation has got here.
Worried about needing to leave myself, hoping I'm ready, 100% sure or not - AND - him and well.... his situation and how they are.
My brother may do what it takes to make ends meet but his heart is gold and he does nothing whod hurt another.
It's just hard to see things that are "Not other option" be it me from my situation with the mental & relationship health, or him with that; especially since he's my lil bro.
Family shouldn't be like that.

 

This has nothing to do with anything other than saying ridiculous things, but: I was drunkenly leaving a party (girlfriend was driving me home) and I hugged one of my coworkers/friends named Trevor, who was also drunk. As we leaned in I just whispered really quietly "you hug like you have no diploma" and then I walked out. The next day he said they just stood around looking at each other after I left like "wtf does that even mean?"

 

Amazing haha

 

My piece of shit former brother in law was like this to the umpteenth degree. He had a lot of issues from having a bunch of step fathers, being brought up in military school, and his time in the marines, which is understandable.....but everybody but my sister soon became "the enemy". Everyone was a lazy, dishonest, manipulative, degenerate, hypocrite in his mind.....even though he ran a "non-profit" supposedly devoted to aids education until the state audited him out of business, and then moved on to convincing his grandma to give him all of her inheritance (she had old oil money) so he could do nothing for a decade, etc.

He was also mentally and physically abusive to my sister, to the point where, imo, she became brainwashed against the rest of the family for more than a decade. She's finally gotten away from him (of course he was and continues to be a complete dick about that), but the damage he caused to my sister is going to take years of work to undo.

...If I was ever gonna end someone...

 

The more I talk about my family, the more I realize how messed up, and abnormal we were/are.

As a kid you work so hard to convince yourself THIS IS NORMAL. WE ARE FINE, haha.

 

It's so wild watching other ppl's family dynamics. I know someone who says she just has to ask her family for anything and they'll do it or give it. I hear her asking them favors constantly that I'd never ask anyone lol. But then I hear her talking to them rudely and hanging up on them and I'm like dang!

But then I know ppl think my interactions with my mother are over the top and probably come off ungrateful after years of resentment built up so you never really know I guess.

 

Sometimes I do this thing where I am thinking about something insignificant that happened a few days prior and then all of a sudden it dawns on me that I didn't handle it properly or screwed up. Then I think about it obsessively and beat myself up for days or weeks. But this time I have a legit reason to overthink it and panic so I'm like ugggggggh

 

you know when someone like uses your insecurities to twist the knife in your heart hahaha its great.
I've been thinking a lot about how boring and insignificant I am. I have nothing to offer to anyone

 

That's me again with Kingdom Leaks' users. So, is there something I can do about that ? I'm raging :


I can't control myself when engaging with trolls, I don't want them to continue with their hateful rhetorics. I'm done trying to ignore that shit, these kind of people should suffer consequences and learn from their mistakes, instead of offending every single person and using them as jokes.

Idk why but the link doesn't show up.

 

I feel this way too, obviously it's not true because y'all like me for whatever reason and I like you

 

@Petit nain des Îles hey I just wanted to thank you both. Re reading this definitely makes me feel better. I want to stop being upset with family and it's just so hard.. ;_;

 

You're welcome. You do so much good to this community. Don't hesitate to vent your frustrations. I won't say I get it, but I realize how hard it sometimes is. I wish I could leave my parents and live on my own 24/7, but thanks to my stupid father, I'm stuck in the goddamn same position, can't drive, can't even eat at University, am starving myself every single day so I can have enough money to take the train and/or the bus and to take my meds. But I try not let all of that tear me down. It's really hard. I want to save my family, my mom, my brother, but I don't know what to do with such a toxic father who doesn't even care about antyhing but his own "needs" (yeah, cigarettes, alcohol, and supposed mistresses help you relax because we're such a pain in the ass for you... what the hell "dad").

Sorry, I don't even know why I'm saying this, I should've just made another post. I'll do it at another occasion. Thank you as well, that's all I wanted to say in the first place.