(Reasons We're Probably Not) Dating Or In A Relationship Thread NSFW • Page 353

That's the strange thing about meeting love interests on message boards. They know far too much about you.

 

She knows me better than I know me

 

I don't think I have anything too incriminating. I have a lot of stuff that I don't talk about on here too. I just have the bad habit of posting things that only I would think are funny. I'm the same irl tho

 

Was suppose to go on a date but then she cancelled but she kept texting me and stuff so I asked her out again and then she ghosted. The worst.

 

Sorry man.

 

So I'm making a big problem out of nothing.

I work at a dog daycare. It's a pretty easy job. I spend most of the day playing with dogs and chatting with co-workers.

All of my co-workers are high school seniors. There is this one girl who I really like but is way too young for me. She is 18 and I'm 27. I feel like a creep for liking her but I can't help. We get along real well and we always spend the whole shift talking without running out of things to say.

She has a bf in college who she never sees. I obviously want to ask her out but can't because it would be weird since she is in high school. And of course she has a bf so it would be wrong. Also she is going to a different college then her bf at the end of summer. So it would be pointless because she will be gone by summer.

So I am having a real hard time moving on. I have to work with her alone a lot and I really want to ask her out but can't. Also I dread the day when she goes to college. She says she will work here during breaks but who knows.

So I'm handling a simple problem horribly. Sorry for the long post.

 

I would advise against dating a high school student as an adult

 

Yeah but it's really hard not to say anything. And what if she breaks up with her boyfriend? Plus she'll be done with school in May.

But then she's going to college at the end of summer.

 

Hey, everyone is different, develops and matures differently, "age is a number", blah blah blah. You do you. But, I'm gonna agree with Ian and advise against it.

 

Her best friend works here and I want to talk to her about it but she might spill the beans. I kind of want to talk to someone about this but don't know who. I'm too embarrassed to talk about it to a therapist.

 

Yeah I'd advise against that. That's something I would personally stray from and I'm closer to their age than yours.

And her friend will 1000 percent tell her.

 

So who do I talk to?

 

feelings pass. go get tinder or something.

 

Tinder is both the best and worst thing to do

 

I learned from my own experience dating too much younger is usually not the best, largely because people are both in different places in their lives, understanding of their self/world, and maturity being an issues. You can't fast tracks these things. Personally I'd never go younger than 21 but the closer I get to 30 the more and more "The number in my mind" suggests an increase.
When I met my fiancee I was 23, she had just turned 20 and there was so much growing pains with her that that is what in fact lead to us not speaking for a few years cus we fell out. We had to grow up and come back together to have the good we do now.

Not judging but there is a certain... weird factor I'd feel going near a High School student, 18 or not. I wouldn't do it.
Also I'd think about stuff like meeting parents and them wondering why the fuck someone whos almost 10 years older (as you are) is dating 18 year olds. Iunno no passed judgement here just to much of an uncomfortable situation and issues that could arise there for me.

 

You're murmuring something about a David in your sleep.

 

Yeah just had to stop talking to a girl cause she was in high school and her Tinder profile made it seem like she was in College and 21.

 

In addition to "weirdness" there's the power dynamics which are so often just off in those relationships where the girl is so young and the man is well... grown. Hard pass. Been that girl, most girls I know have been that girl at some point, and it's not a cool place to be.

 

So how am I supposed to deal with this? Just be miserable until she goes to college then be really miserable for a couple of months?

 

We're all here to help and encourage, but so far none of us have advised pursuing her. How have you gotten over crushes and break ups in the past? Treat her like a co-worker, and keep your head up and go meet other and new people is my advice.

 

I understand your feelings, but breh I would just take the L and move on. New people come each day, don't sweat it.

 

I've never been in a relationship (I know dating her for a first gf is a bad choice) so I've never had to deal with a breakup.

And I've never had a crush too big before.

 

so what does take the l mean?

But yeah it just sucks working with her so often.

 

Take the Loss, and move forward.