Mental Health Thread • Page 477

Credit scores are a scam I hate them but something in collections is a long way from being permanently damaging. It’s not super urgent or anything but it’s something you’ll want to get to the bottom of. Once you find out who is claiming the debt send them a debt validation request under the FDCPA. This blog walks you through it:
What is a Debt Validation Letter? [Free Template]
If you’re on top of your bills which it sounds like you are it’s probably a small amount that fell though the cracks somewhere. Or they’re just mistaken and won’t be able to validate it.

 

Yeah idk why I guess I was naive enough to assume I'd get a notice if anything was gonna be sent to collections?? A scary red window envelope letter or something idek. Like if y'all want ur money I'll pay it but idek what it is. All my recurring bills and credit cards are on auto payments so it has to be a medical something maybe? But I've paid up everything I've received at least that I'm aware of so I'm racking my brain. No use worrying about it now and I need to redirect my brain to something else and not let it ruin my day but my anxiety is wanting to override my logic. Uggh

 

Feeling low and meh today. In the middle of increasing the dosages of my two meds and I’m sure they’re largely responsible for my physical issues but hard to ever fully convince my brain it isn’t something else. Also annoyed with myself for gaining weight on the new meds. Gotta work on that.

 

This time of year is extra depressing because I thought I was going to spend the holidays with someone, only to have my heart broken instead.

 

This exact thing happened to my aunt last year. It ended up being a medical bill and was under $20!! They said they sent her a physical bill (she doesn’t do anything online) but she never actually got the bill in the mail so she had no idea she owed anything. She got it all taken care of and her credit score is back up but still ridiculous all that happened over less than $20! I hope it’s something similar for you and not anything major and you can get it sorted out asap!

 

Fuck I'm depressed. I haven't gotten out of bed.

 

Me the past two weeks

 

My BIL isn't doing well with his cancer treatments. He hasn't been responding to chemo for a while so he's been trying to get into clinical trials but it's still not going well. He is trying to get into a trial that's one state over but can't afford the travel financially and even if he could, doesn't know if he should or can risk traveling with his health. It just sucks. Obv I care about him as a human as I've known him most of my life, but he's also my nephews father and it's just brutal and also bs that someone with less money because he's literally spent most of his adult life battling cancer and therefore now has no job or savings can't get care he needs. But even if he could afford the trials who knows if they'd even work. He has to travel and push his health to the limits just to even see if he qualifies, which he might not. Then even if he does qualify, who knows if it'll work. Yay USA healthcare system

 

I had a huge mental breakdown a few weeks ago with my wife after some issues came up. It was long conversation spanning over a few hours and most productive conversation I've had in two years.

The realization that COVID messed me up both physically and mentally. We've been together nearly seven years, but in that time frame she has only seen me cry four times. I have become a shell of person who is terrified of leaving my house whether it's for work or anything else. I stopped going to shows, movies, the bar that I worked at, and stopped talking to all of my friends. I have cut myself off from feeling any emotions (positive or negative). I'm not abusing my medication per se because I'm taking as prescribed and it's working on a few symptoms, but the best feeling of is I feel nothing at all. So I'm trying to take a step forward to see what I can do to feel more like a human. It's funny because I'm usually on the other end of therapy and now trying to find the right fit for me.

 

^ the above to everyone posting in here.

 

Love you bud. Take care of yourself. Feel free to reach out if you ever need someone to talk to.

 

I am feeling intensely aware of time today as it relentlessly barrels forwards and towards me having a child and how I don't know anything about being a parent, let alone anything about this role I'm filling in for (and maybe stepping into) at work, let alone anything about being an actual adult, etc.

We got three feet of snow last Friday (after an overnight hospital stay with my wife Wednesday night) and since then, we haven't been able to get out of our driveway, half of our power went out, and our furnace broke. Most of those problems have since been temporarily (if not permanently) fixed, but I'm just so desperate for a day where I can do nothing and nothing goes wrong. I'm so afraid I'll never be able to relax again.

 

I would also just like to say how thankful I am for this thread but also this site in general and the people on it. I've been posting in some capacity for 12 years now and I care about some of the folks here more than some people I see IRL on a weekly basis. I wish the best for all of you and am so thankful I have you to celebrate or commiserate with when I feel like I have no one else to talk to.

 

Buddy, no one knows how to be a parent. You’re gonna kill it. In a good way.

 

Yeah you’re ahead of where I was at just by realizing their is no real playbook. I didn’t get that shock until we were leaving the hospital and I was like wait that’s it? I don’t know how to keep this thing alive lol

 

Just echoing those last two posts Aaron. I was crazy nervous at first mainly due to my wife being so good with kids. I wasn’t. However it comes pretty natural and I might mess up sometimes but I know I’m doing my best. That’s all our children/SO ask of us. Also I’m still not good with kids BUT I’m good with my kids. Aka I strongly dislike other children

 

Guys, after the debt collection agency never called me back, I called them again this morning and the debt is from my previous apartment complex. Apparently they're trying to charge a ton in extra expenses from my final walkthrough and then they mailed the bill to my old address. So they literally mailed it to the apartments they knew I'd just moved out of, and never tried getting hold of me in any other way even tho they at the least knew my phone number, email, and apartment complex i moved into. They even called me after I moved out to tell me I had a package delivered. But never bothered to talk to me about any of this. I asked for the debt people to send me the thing in writing so idk but like wow. And it's a lot more than I expected. I never got my deposit back so I just figured that covered it. And I have no kids and no pets and that apartment was tiny. There's no way cleaning things cost more than that deposit.

 

I guess it might depend on where you live, but I'm pretty sure they have to give you an itemized list of everything they take out of your security deposit, and depending on how long you lived there they're not allowed to charge for certain things like painting and replacing the carpet.

 

My leasing company made me sign a separate form from my lease agreeing to outrageous fines for non wear and tear things, and a lot of them absolutely cost more than my security deposit, so idk how screwed I am haha. The carpet is a mess and there are black marks on the walls where I had hung up some old Christmas lights. But I've been here for 7+ years sooo

@Kiana if you didn't sign anything like that then I feel like they can't do anything but idk

 

Ugh yeah idk. I asked the debt collectors to send me the debt validation later (thanks to whoever linked and suggested that!). Which I am glad for because when I found out what the debt was for I was so surprised and taken aback that I couldn't really formulate coherent thoughts around it and they were asking me for my payment information and I'm like girl. I cannot just drop $500 like that. And why would they send the invoice to the apartment they knew I just moved out of. and I had my mail forwarded by USPS so I still should have gotten it anyway. I've honestly never lived anywhere where I didn't get at least some of my deposit back let alone owed extra money on top of it. We even ended up moving earlier than planned so we had like an entire buffer week where we were moved out and just spent deep cleaning.

The thing is we were going to renew our lease but we were so done with management not communicating and charging for full rent when the amenities that are supposed to be included were not even made available like the on site gym that was under construction for months and the pool that was almost never opened much in the summer because they were always "cleaning it"

My current apartment lately has had a little cute coffee station with free coffee in the lobby and my first thought was that they better not increase my rent to justify this lol

Hope landlords are first to go in the apocalypse

 

Tired of getting nowhere in the job market. tired of fucking applying, interviewing, and then getting ghosted by ratfuck recruiters. been at this shit for such a stupid long time that i can only assume i suck so fucking much. been at it for way too fucking long.

glad i still have another job but man fuck everything

 

That all sounds like you had a shady landlord who sold a bullshit debt to a collector. Someone mentioned it but most states need to send an itemized detail and also most states they can only then deduct it from the security deposit. Anyway I would be surprised if they actually thought it was worth it to file a complaint in court on it. I did housing work for a while and I hate landlords like this so feel free to dm if you want me to look at the law a little more.

 

Praying I'm able to relax/catch a break this weekend. My body and mind is so tired, and I know it's only going to get more difficult in a couple of months. Genuinely afraid I might never be able to relax again.

 

I thought I had therapy this weekend but I guess not. I think this week has been better. I’ve been doing my daily walks and I’m taking a mental health break next week off work. I’ve been taking my meds with my increased dosage. . (I stopped taking it in the weekends bc I’d forget) I’m suppose to update my pcp but I’m going to do that next week bc I want my therapists opinion to see if she thinks they’re working.