(Reasons We're Probably Not) Dating Or In A Relationship Thread NSFW • Page 264

I mean, this too.

 

Happiness only real when shared.

Or whatever that quote was.

 

When discussing love, Lacan used this metaphor: "Imagine you see in front of you a beautiful flower, or a ripe fruit. You reach out your hand to grab it. But at the moment you do, the flower, or the fruit, bursts into flames. In its place you see another hand appear, reaching back towards your own."
The meanings contained within it are manifold. But, to me, it represents the way in which love is the reaching out toward the objectified being - that which is beautiful or appealing to one's eye - but which simultaneously mirrors ourselves. Love and relationship are, therefore, narcissistic, but altogether worthwhile, insofar as those Others that are so utterly like us represents an infinite number of universes we've yet to explore. Alternatively, if we we just want to look at it purely in terms of biology, we are a social species that have mating rituals that ostensibly end with the production of offspring. Love, as we know it, is the end-result of evolutionary processes that produced the best possible chemicals in our brains for bonding with one another in order to continue the species.

 

Hey man. At least they don't think "terrorist."

 

This is how I've felt so many times. It's kinda depressing. It feels like instinctually, we only love ourselves in others. You can attribute that quote to me

 

Off for an after work coffee with the girl I've been seeing. No idea what's going on between us, feeling this may be a "maybe we should just leave things"... hopefully not though!

 

My most recent relationship was the first time I've ever had the thought, "Holy shit, I could spend my life with this person." and the thought of finding that with someone else sounds so fucking exhausting. The shitty thing about breakups are that you aren't just breaking up with your partner, but with their family and friends, at least, in my case, and that shit fuckin sucks. Although, I will say, since being single I've gotten in the best shape of my life and I've changed a lot of other aspects of my life for the better so, being single right now is probably for the best.

Side note: I think it's important to find someone who adds to your pre-existing happiness and not someone who "makes you happy", ya know? I want my partner and I to want each other but not need each other.

Side side note: I'm also really cautious of getting into something serious cause I plan to move to Japan in a couple years so I'm just like....what's the point? My last relationship wasn't even supposed to happen but....ya know....

 

I've recently been talking to this guy. He is unlike anyone I have ever met, in a good way. I'm afraid I won't listen to myself again and take things faster than I should, then have the relationship we have not work out. A friend of mine told me he's in love with me, and I don't know if she meant that as a joke or if she was half way serious. It somewhat scared me. I also worry about this guy being clingy. I can't handle clinginess. I wanted to talk to another friend about it but I always forget.

 

Went for coffee, everything still seems alright. Can't fucking figure this girl out.
I think I just need a scenario where we're having a drink so that I can fucking relax and stop making terrible conversation. I spoke about ovens tonight. What is wrong with me...

 

I was panicky because the girl I'm dating and I talked about the weather a lot. Turns out she's super into weather. Don't overthink it too much. Just talk! Haha

 

Y'all need some chill.

 

i'll do it

 

Talking about the inane seems like a good thing to me

 

Looks like we won't be discussing our future of our relationship until the 17th when I get my car back from the repair shop. Been really down in the dumps about it, because I probably know that this is it.

 

I very much appreciate your repertoire of Frozen gifs.

 

Are you guys long distance or somethin? And how long have you been together?

 

Not long distance, we've lived together. Been together for 2 1/2 years. My car went into the shop last weekend so I've been staying at my parents. She talked to me before I left saying she wanted to take a break from our relationship, which is understandable, her grandma passed away, who pretty much raised her. But now it seems like less of a break and more like a permanent break up.

 

Oof, sorry to hear that, man. Well, who knows what could happen, but I will say this. When my dad died I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years a month later. It was really tough but something about his death just kinda reinforced what I do/don't want in life. I know that's not the most encouraging thing you want to hear I'm just saying, I know how death can affect someone, especially if there are already problems in the relationship, and in my case, there were.

 

I have deleted Tinder because it only pisses me off with those damn alerts telling me I can swipe again.

 

I appreciate it. Yeah, she pretty much said that it made her want to think and reevaluate things in her life. We've had some small problems but nothing ever huge, but it might be enough for her to think she would be happier without me it seems like

 

I don't think I've ever used up my swipes. I never spent much time on Tinder at once though

 

Is right or left the good one?

 

Right

 

Right is.

Unfortunately I'm always getting left swipes, though the pics I have on Tinder are horrendous. I just don't have it in me to take a serious photo.