Accountability in Music • Page 616

then why do it? im sympathetic to the idea that bands needs to make money but i cant imagine tmp makes anymore money than he could get at any regular ass job he could find within a week of looking. just another cases of someone feeling entitled to their platform.

 

and even if he's done all that - I don't know and honestly don't care - he and the band are acting against the survivor's wishes by continuing to tour.

 

i mean the victim puts it pretty well at the end of their account of everything that happened:

 

My guess is that he think he’s done all the correct steps in the process and needs to do nothing more. Dylan never responded to the more recent longer Google doc explanation of what happened.

Things seem to be working out okay for him though. He still gets to tour and people are still listening to his music and coming to the shows, so why listen to what the survivor wants or people championing for accountability from him want? (Speaking as if I’m Dylan)

 

after reading that long google doc i cannot honestly believe dylan thinks he did everything right, he has to know hes full of shit and i mean maybe its just me but that would eat me up inside. its never too late to do the right thing, in my opinion, but when you actively avoid doing the right thing for as long as he has it seems unlikely that he ever will.

 

I'm also not saying knowledge of the situation needs to be imputed onto every single person. It's possible that Doll Skin somehow doesn't know about all this, or thinks it was resolved or whatever. My original point was just that, these days, if I was in a band I would at least google whether there were any allegations against a headliner that's offering a tour slot to me. I care about this shit and I wouldn't want to be on tour with a headliner who did what Dylan did and is trying to get away with it with no accountability. I would feel disgusted and ashamed at myself for touring with a band like that. But if you didn't do your research beforehand, you really can't later on use ignorance as a defense.

And if I was in a headlining band, I would do the same thing for every band I was considering taking out on tour with me.

 

and mostly I really hope that condimentcutie doesn't have to get involved yet again to do the work of educating a band who has decided to tour with her abuser, like she had to do with Proper.

 

I posted this in here a while back but it was during an active discussion on the situation so it may have been missed but I’ll share again.

According to Dylan's camp (this comes from Jetty Bones), the situation happened when Dylan was younger and was "accidental" and a result of "not fully understanding communication."

I’m not sharing that to defend him obviously, that’s just how his side views the situation. This comes from a friend of mine who Jetty Bones was talking about the situation to.

 

that could not be less helpful tbh could not care less how his side wants to spin the situation to make him look better

 

lol dylan's just about the same age as me, right? in 2013 me and everybody i hung out with knew not to even attempt to try anything with a visibly inebriated woman. im from the midwest, a hot bed of "boys will be boys" culture, and at the age of 20-21 we understood that was a line you didn't cross, period. and if we saw someone doing something like that we stepped in. i find the "they were young" excuse to be flat out embarrassing, and everyone who was in that room that night and morning should be embarrassed as well. and ashamed.

 

Also, yeah, I'd imagine it's pretty easy to "not fully understand communication" when the person you're "communicating" with is a blackout drunk girl you've never met before.

FOH

 

I feel like I see the “not fully understanding” thing a lot and I mentally cannot ever grasp that.

At any age past being like a legitimate kid.

 

The strangest thing about Doll Skin being on the tour is that they retweeted this tweet a few weeks ago which directly contradicts being on tour with TMP. So confusing.

 

Is it worth reaching out to the bands with concerns about who they're touring with? I figure with bigger bands it will just get fielded and likely spiked by their management, but maybe with smaller ones they might respond. Or is it they need to do due diligence with researching who they tour with, not their fans?

 

I don't ever think it hurts for fans to speak up and attempt to bring stuff to the band's attention but i also absolutely think the burden is on the band/their management to do proper diligence beforehand.

 

The burden is on the bands at the end of the day. If you hand that process off to management or whoever else, well, I just hope you really trust that person to have accountability as a concern when they're doing it. But the buck stops at each individual artist.

If you're the headliner, you need to check every band you're thinking of bringing out on tour. If you're offered a support slot, you need to at least check the headliner and maybe also ask the headliner if they can tell you who else is on the tour so you can check them too (I understand that lots of supporting artists don't know who else is going to be a on a tour with them other than the headliner until it is announced publicly).

I just feel like that's the bare minimum you can do, personally. Google isn't perfect but it is free and easily available to everyone. If you don't at least do that before signing on to a tour, I don't know how you shouldn't be held accountable for associating with the wrong people.

 

wonder what changed, or are they the sort of band who talk the talk until the 'right' offer comes along?

 

not to sound like I’m nitpicking or defending the band, and I agree that they should do their homework ahead of time, but why would they Google the band with “allegations” behind them? Maybe they just googled the band name and in that case, to the surprise of no one, nothing comes up on the first two pages of Google (and how many people even click to get to page 2).

 

I would personally always google a band I was planning on touring with just to make sure they don't have abuse allegations against them. I wouldn't want to tour with a band like that. Just googling the name of the band isn't always enough, especially if the allegations never got much traction. I would google "[band name] abuse", "[band name] allegations", "[band name] assault", etc. and try to be as thorough as possible.

I already try to do this in my everyday life whenever I start listening to and enjoying a new band. Before I get too into them I do research to try and see if they're people I should actually be listening to and supporting. It's not hard.

 

Is nobody going to acknowledge how insane that sounds?

 

to.....confirm the people you're choosing to support aren't terrible people?

 

Is it the same for a movie you want to see? Google the entire main/supporting cast and production to ensure there's nothing outstanding before deciding to see it? I'm not sure I see a difference. It sounds exhausting to assume the worst in people for that to be the first thing you think of doing when you hear a new song you like.

Of course I don't think terrible people should be supported. But it looks like I view it all as a spectrum, and I just view this stance of the spectrum a tad extreme.

 

I would wager that 99% of most people who discover new bands don’t immediately google to see if they have allegations. I don’t think that’s the first (or second or third etc) place most people’s minds go.

 

Big difference to me in privately consuming something vs. publicly endorsing other acts by virtue of touring together.

 

that's fine, but it's not insane behavior, as described.