(Reasons We're Probably Not) Dating Or In A Relationship Thread NSFW • Page 106

No matter how this "date" goes this thread has given me a lot of laughs today so thank you all you rock ❤️

 

You don't have to stare. You could clean her like a cat, with your tongue and that would solve the staring issue

 

So far on Tinder bc I'm bored, 10 dead animals, 5 guns, and 3 tractors.

 

Sanchez have you lost your god damn mind I am not going to lick this girl

 

If I see anything with "hunting", "fishing", or "mudding", I'm not about to message them.

 

...yet...

 

I'll give you all updates on the licking situation

 

I know mudding isn't code for scat but that makes it way more interesting

 

sexy kisses and rubbing soap on each others bodies. YOU'RE KILLING ME SMALLS. TAG ME IN. GOD DAMNIT IM LONELY

 

what the fuck, y'all need to move to new england

edit: actually maybe specifically boston because maine and new hampshire probably have plenty of those things too

 

lick her bhole

 

I mean ideally that's how it would go but in reality it's just like "so how was work today? Fuck I'm cold my turn to stand in the water. Why don't you have any better smelling body wash? Is this conditioner or something? Did you remember to get me a towel?"

 

Swiping on tinder in Santa Barbara just made my heart hurt and made me feel bad about myself but swiping where I am now just made me feel bad for tinder. Seriously though the concentration of extremely attractive people in SB is unreal.

 

I'd be down for that as long as I can wear a hazmat suit.

 

I'm not against eating ass but first date might be a bit of an escalation. That said this chick seems to be adamant on liberating our sexualities so fuck it who knows.

 

I thought mudding was code for anal sex when a girl is on her period

 

what have you two got planned for this evening?

 

if you're in a shower with someone and you're worried about whether or not you remembered a towel you're doing it wrong goddamn get your head in the game

 

Taking her to dinner and having the TOSSED SALAD.

 

I'm under the assumption we're going to surf Netflix for a while and then fucking each other's brains out will be on the agenda somewhere in there.


She has a lot of guns she seems to be a fan of hunting and I noticed a confederate flag plate on the front of her jeep so it's taking everything in me not to discuss my disdain for those things

 

Scott I forget to get a towel for myself half the time

 

Please live tweet the fucking, if possible.

 

It'll be hard to live tweet and choke at the same time