Accountability in Music • Page 11

yeah, all of this is good to hear

 

Melanie Martinez accused of r**e:

 

Jesus Christ.

 

Just don't look at the replies... disgusting

 

This has been on my mind for a bit now, and I'm just wondering what everyone thinks.

I'm in college, and my band was invited to play at a house party. The host of the party, a senior, recently cheated on his girlfriend, gave her no apology, and has essentially brushed her off. He continues to hold parties where underclassmen tend to be the main demographic, I guess in an attempt to find fame elsewhere, since most of the senior class no longer associates with him. I told my band I was not comfortable playing a show hosted by him, and they lashed out, saying I'm thinking too far into it and that we should be thinking about the band and not other people's personal lives. I've since left the band. Am I overreacting? I just don't think we, as a band, should be playing for someone like that, even on such a miniscule level.

I'm sorry if this is a bad thread to post this on, but it seemed relevant.

 

Its just a house show, why throw integrity out the window for essentially nothing? Sounds like a major red flag that they don't give a shit about something where they gain so little, imagine what they'd be willing to ignore for an actual opportunity

 

Evan's statement.... It's not the worst one from this scene, but like... if my friend came to me and told me the same story that this woman told him. I wouldn't see it through any other "lens" than you're my friend, fuck this guy. why does the employee/employer relationship matter here. I'm not saying it shouldn't to us, were the ones paying attention to the pattern. But it shouldn't matter to him. He should have just seen his friend needed help...

 

Is Melanie Martinez the most high profile artist yet? Interested to see if this gets picked up on.

 

Not to de-rail any conversations happening in this thread right now (which btw, much love/respect to whomever started it), but have any of the other members of Brand New issued statements yet? I've been out of the loop on all of this this past week, and clearly I have some catching up to do.

 

Exactly this.

His response follows everything I’ve been told about him, though. I know a number of people who have cut him out because of his shitty behavior.

 

https://t.co/fInGeFzrMR

Yikes

 

Holy shit.

 

NOPE.

 

I bailed out on following that. What a group of weak people.

 

Probably a cue I should follow. Fuck them. My gf asked me the other day if I foresee myself returning to their catalog, and honestly I can't. In regards to Evan Weiss, I don't really know anything about IIOI, they were a band I had been meaning to look into, but given the accusations and that statement, fuck that.

 

Is this really where we're at now? You left a band because a guy who was hosting a house party cheated on his girlfriend? That is a situation that couldn't possibly have less to do with you, why are you even turning it into a mental conundrum for yourself?

This is where I begin to think we've reached the point of saturation. There are people who are true, wounded, permanently scarred victims of someone else's behaviour, and then there are people who for whatever reason have a social need to have their hurt feelings validated. Its important to start differentiating between the two.

 

no, they left the band because the band felt these things were entirely unimportant in the scheme of things and made them feel uncomfortable for even thinking they shouldn't play

 

They couldn't be more correct.

 

this is a good post

 

If you're into rampant speculation, its a great post.

Zero of anybody involved with this band in question did anything remotely wrong, why is it being implied that they did or would?

 

nothing is being implied that they did anything, but it shows that if, for a ridiculous example, brand new asked them to tour they wouldn't even think twice at it

 

I genuinely don't know where you're even pulling these distant ideas from

What any of this ever had to do with this guy who quit the band is beyond me

 

Its pretty simple, don't work with shitty people. There are levels of shitty people, from abusers to just like kind of assholes. But if you know they're kind of shitty, why bother?

My band was looking for a keyboardist just to play shows, we still are. I was rec'd a guy and talked to him about joining, but before we even met, he sent a friend of mine gross shit on Tinder. So my friend came to me, and I talked to him about it, and he gave some super half-assed uhh uhh "that was my friend on my account", "she just didn't get our sense of humor" dodging accountability non-apology. So I cut it off there.

This wasn't anything bad enough to publicly attack him, or to talk to the guy who rec'd him and get him blacklisted from the scene or something. But it was a red flag, that he would say some creepy shit and then try to dodge any responsibility is not a good look, and I have to be zero tolerance on that kind of bullshit.

So its simple, don't work with assholes, or creeps, or abusers, or anyone doing anything worse.

 

Everything about this. Do not be an enabler.

 

While I don’t condone cheating of any kind, at what point do you draw a line between someone’s personal life and yours? I’m honestly just curious of others’ thoughts on this.