Brand New Band • Page 794

It's unfortunate. Once a bad boy, always a bad boy.

 

I assumed he was talking about you

 

Yeah, he really was the James Dean of chorus.fm

 

Really? Weird, why would I even think that, right? I mean, it's not like I was mocked and attacked after describing how I was abused when I was a kid - something that is still incredibly hard for me to talk about and that I don't do at all offline unless to some of my closest friends - and the first reaction of cooldadbolt is to use a buzzword that he obviously has no clue what he is talking about in order to attack me and feel like shit. Followed by people attacking me left and right and somehow some asshole trying to make a case for me to use the absurdly stupid ebophyle(sp?) excuse for Lacey (like never mind the fact that all I'm saying here is the exact opposite and that Lacey is a serial pedophyle asshole is precisely my whole point).

But sure, I'm the one missing the point here, not anyone saying that lumping underage abuse of people with no capability of consent - like at least three of the Lacey's victims that came forward - with everything else is something we should be doing here. I still stand by all my points, and I truly wish that we could have a mature discussion about this, unfortunately this is clearly not the right place for this.

I'm glad that you feel differently and I hope I'm wrong about this though. I think at least now maybe you can understand why I feel differently about closet or even unconscious Lacey supporters around here.

@Kingjohn_654 , check out Unlikely, by Far From Alaska. Great female fronted band from here, they sing in English most of the time and they are amazing.

Now excuse me, the father of one of my closest friends just passed away and I'm needed elsewhere, not trying to make sense on this stupid thread.

 

I almost typed a response but remembered I've already done my confusing dance with this guy and it lead nowhere.

 

or you know maybe he has a heightened sensitivity to this stuff due to the abuse he faced in the past and can't nonchalantly argue his case as a bystander.
Like, I get it, he chooses some weird hills to die on, but at the end of the day he's still an ally and we should treat him as such and understand where he is coming from, because most of us are very privileged in coming to this situation as an (ex-)fan of the band, and not a victim of abuse.

 

the guy blocking and berating everyone with a slightly different view is not an ally, not to me

 

I understand, but we are all guilty of that to some degree, but at the end of the day I think we are all on the same side, we are just arguing weird semantics.

 

Shrugging it off child abuse survivors: you are doing this right. If you can do it, why can't Lacey supporters do it too, right? Mocking instead of trying to real understand. Thinking before typing send and try to put yourselves on the victims shoes. If some of you can't do it with one right in front of you, why anyone should expect that you would treat any better those that were Lacey's victims?

Thank you.

But it's not an "weird hill" to die on if you actually stop and think about it. Try to put yourselves on the shoes of victims of child abuse and think how fucked up is to try to lump everything together like it's all "wrong doing" and that's it? No, it takes a real special of fucking monster to abuse an underage kid. If people can't grasp that, then it's pointless.

 

I haven't blocked anyone on this website, certainly not for as little as this poster has

 

don't worry, we can all agree on that. Jesse Lacey? Huge piece of shit.

 

Dude, you are way out of line. I've not shrugged off child abusers and our previous back and forth had nothing to do with this.

Why don't you just calm down, I am not attacking you and I've not defended any of the celebrities mentioned. This is literally my first post since the news broke.

 

Dude, I know, but surely you've been a little meaner to people than you should've.
He's a survivor. I think he deserves we hear him out, and coupled with the fact that english doesn't seem to be his first language I think we can cut him some slack.

and @straylightrunner, with all due respect, I think you, too, should help us learn instead of attacking us, even if it can seem a little futile. We are all friends here, even if we end up agreeing to disagree.

 

If you can't understand and empathize why I would block someone being so adamant with lumping child abuse with overage people being abused emotionally, fuck you. Honestly. And this comes from someone that respected you and your struggles for more than ten years. So there's that. I felt hurt and decided to give up on your arguments. Do I really need to explain why you were bothering me so much? Now I'm out.

 

Cutting slack goes out the window when I'm blocked, especially after hours and hours of explaining my point and still being told I'm excusing Jesse in any way shape or form.

 

For the 20th time: David Bowies victim was 14. Every example of other rockstars doing it that was brought up was with underage people. You are straw manning the fuck out of me

 

better not see any more Gregs in here

 

Yeah I mean he just threw some insults at me and accused me of defending Jesse Lacey when I said our prior interactions were confusing. That's really not cool.

 

It's ridiculous and being told I've done the same to others is insulting

 

And I said I didn't know. For the 20th time. And how is this useful to anything but ammo for Brand New supporters again? Dude. I have real life problems to attend now. Sorry if you felt hurt, but trust me, you made me really unconfortable talking with you. And you are still doing it. And I'm replying instead of facing the real shit I need to. So I'm sorry but I have real life stuff to attend now.

 

I'm sorry if I insulted you, all I'm saying is that @straylightrunner seems to be going through some shit and has experienced sexual abuse in the past so maybe it can be hard to have a discussion at the moment.

 

Put me back on ignore it was better when you weren't quoting me with bullshit

 

Weren't people just making clear links to other issues in the music industry to outline how long this has been going on for and that as a whole, the music community needs to make the choice to support the right people?

 

Ive been able to have productive meaningful conversations with other people who have experienced abuse, some very very VERY close to me, without it turning into anything like this.

 

I'm saying he can't right now, quite obviously. Like, your responses aren't unjustified, but just keep in mind he's not in a good place. s'all I'm saying, man.